This article was co-authored by Imad Jbara and by wikiHow staff writer, Eric McClure. Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.
There are 8 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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It can be irritating to have a good conversation end abruptly for seemingly no reason, only to have the other person text back later with some lame excuse and basic apology. If it’s getting to the point where this happens with some regularity, it might be worth addressing. However, some people are just kind of forgetful, and a lot of great gals out there aren’t glued to their phones. As a result, it’s best to play it safe here most of the time and not assume the worst. If you’re looking for tips on how to reply to the dreaded “Sorry for late reply!” text, we’ve got your back.
Steps
What does it mean if a girl apologizes for not responding?
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1It usually just means that she forgot or something came up. Unless you were in the middle of a back-and-forth text conversation where the two of you were responding immediately, it’s safe to assume she just put her phone down and forgot or she had something come up. If this isn’t a regular thing, don’t read too much into it.[1]
- You don’t know what’s happening on her end. Maybe she got a call from her mom, or someone rang the doorbell and she forgot to come back to her phone. Maybe she was texting while doing homework and got caught up in what she was doing. Give her the benefit of the doubt unless you have reason to assume otherwise.
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2It could mean she’s not all that interested if this happens a lot. If this happens on a regular basis, it might be a signal that she doesn’t see you as a priority.[2] It is still very possible that she just isn’t glued to her phone, but use your intuition here. If she isn’t super excited about texting you, you’re always texting first, and she doesn’t seem super apologetic, it might be time to stop reaching out.[3]
- In some very rare cases, it could mean the opposite of this. If she has anxiety about replying to you, it can cause her to overthink every text she sends.[4]
What should I say if a girl says sorry for the late reply?
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1If this is not a super common thing, accept the apology and move on.[7] Sure, it’s rude to not respond on time, but it’s also not the biggest mistake in the world. If she’s a little apologetic and this is a rare thing, play it cool.[8] You could reply:
- “Not the end of the world.” This is a smooth response that still acknowledges she did something wrong. It also leaves it on her to keep the conversation going.
- “All good. What’s going on?” This is a solid way to just move on and keep the conversation going.
- “It’s alright.” If you want to subtly hint that you’re annoyed, this works well.
- “It’s okay.” This is a good one if you want to play it cool! It implies you aren’t thinking all that hard about it—which means you really don’t care.
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2If she does this all the time, tell her you’re a little hurt. If she chronically forgets to reply to you, cancels plans to talk, or takes days to respond, she may just be a bit flaky. If you care about the relationship, tell her how it makes you feel. She’s probably not doing it on purpose, and she may make an effort to cut it out.[9] You could say:
- “It really hurts my feelings when you do this. It feels like you’re just ignoring me sometimes.”
- “Do you not want to talk to me or something? Why do you always forget to reply to me?”
- “I don’t appreciate it when you take forever to respond.”
- “Please make an effort to stop forgetting to reply. I get that stuff happens, but this is getting ridiculous.”
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3You could flip it on her if you think she’s playing games. If you’re starting to get the vibe that she’s doing this on purpose, you can always fight fire with fire. It’s not the most mature option, but giving her a taste of her own medicine may solve the problem. The next time she pulls this stunt, wait a few hours or days before replying.[10] You might say:
- “Oh, sorry, I was busy too haha.”
- “Sorry for the late reply on my end too. I’m just so forgetful!”
- “All good. I’ve had stuff to do anyway.”
- “Not a big deal,” or, “It’s okay.” This is a super passive-aggressive move, since you aren’t even apologizing for the delay on your end. Prepare for a potentially combative response if you go this route.
What does it mean if she always forgets to reply?
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1It's possible that she just isn’t interested in talking. That might sound harsh, but it’s better to accept it now than to keep pushing for a relationship that isn’t going to happen.[11] If she’s forgetful often enough that it’s bothering you, she's probably not worth pursuing anyway. There are plenty of fish in the sea![12]
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2She may just be a little hesitant to open up. Pay attention to when she “forgets” to text. If it seems to always happen when you ask a personal or intimate question, it’s possible that she’s not ready for anything super serious. Just lay off any deeper conversation topics and keep things light. She may open up to you eventually![13]
Expert Q&A
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QuestionWhat should you do if a girl doesn't text you back?Imad JbaraImad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.
Dating CoachMove on and focus on living your best life. Don't spend your time sitting around and waiting for a reply—that only takes away from your main purpose in life, which is focusing on the impact you give the rest of the world.
References
- ↑ https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2018/01/ignoring-each-other-in-the-age-of-instant-communication/550325/
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://www.hercampus.com/wellness/8-confusing-texts-guys-send-how-respond/
- ↑ https://observer.com/2010/09/so-sorry-to-do-this-flakiness-epidemic-sweeps-digital-new-york/
- ↑ https://observer.com/2010/09/so-sorry-to-do-this-flakiness-epidemic-sweeps-digital-new-york/
- ↑ https://observer.com/2010/09/so-sorry-to-do-this-flakiness-epidemic-sweeps-digital-new-york/
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://www.hercampus.com/wellness/8-confusing-texts-guys-send-how-respond/
- ↑ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a16811480/mirage-friends-flaky-friends/
- ↑ https://ifstudies.org/blog/the-downside-of-playing-hard-to-get/
- ↑ Imad Jbara. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 5 November 2019.
- ↑ https://www.hercampus.com/wellness/8-confusing-texts-guys-send-how-respond/
- ↑ https://www.mantelligence.com/she-didnt-text-back/
- ↑ https://textgod.com/she-didnt-text-back-how-long-should-i-wait/