28 Funny Jokes to Tell Your Girlfriend

Co-authored by John Keegan and Aly Rusciano

Last Updated: December 18, 2022

Want to make your girlfriend laugh? Whether you’re chatting in person or via text, jokes are a great way to make her smile, impress her, and get her in the mood. From classic dad jokes to flirtatious puns and dirty innuendos, there’s a joke out there for everyone. If you’re not sure where to start, no worries! We’ve put together a list of funny, charming jokes you can text or tell your girlfriend that are sure to make her laugh.

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Funny Jokes to Tell Your Girlfriend

1
“What did one raspberry say to the other? I love you berry much.”
2
“What did the magnet say to the fridge? You’re attractive.”

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3
“What did the barista say to their crush? I like you a latte.”
4
“What flower is the best at kissing? Tulips.”
5
“Never date an apostrophe. They’re possessive.”
6
“Is your name WiFi? Because I feel a connection.”
7
“What do you call insects that are dating? Answer: Love bugs.”
8
“How did the telephone ask its girlfriend out? It gave her a ring.”
9
“What’s the most romantic ship? Courtship.”
10
“Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got fine written all over you.”
11
“Knock knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive you!”
12
“Knock knock. Who’s there? Kiss. Kiss who? Kiss me!”
13
“Knock knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you stunning!”
14
“Knock knock. Who’s there? Cheese. Cheese who? Cheese, you're awfully cute!”
15
“What did the light bulb say to the switch? You turn me on!”
16
“What did the calculator say to the pen? You can always count on me!”
17
“What did the squirrel say to its lover? I’m nuts for you!”
18
“Why did the melons get married in a church? Because they cantaloupe.”
19
“Why shouldn’t you break up with a goalie? Because they’re a keeper.”
20
“Where do hotdogs go on a date? The meatball.”
21
“Why are forks disappointed on Valentine’s Day? They just wanted to spoon.”
22
“What did the two prunes call their dinner plans? A date.”
23
“They say kissing is a love language. Do you want to start a conversation?”
24
“You must be a banana because you’re very a-peeling.”
25
“Ouch! I must have scraped my knee falling for you.”
26
“Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
27
“I’m going to arrest you for robbery because you’ve stolen my heart.”
28
“If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put U and I together.”