How to Make a Guy Jealous Through Texting

Co-authored by Michele Fields

Last Updated: October 25, 2022 References

To make a guy jealous through texting, you have to make him think that you’re spending time with other guys—even if you’re only hanging out with your sister or your favorite kitten. The trick is to be subtle about it and to make him think that you have plenty of ways to fill your time that have nothing to do with him. If you go about this correctly, then the guy will get super jealous and will only want to get closer to you.

Things You Should Know

Make him want you by waiting a few hours (or a day) before responding. Be mysterious and make it sound like you’re going on a date.
Flirt a little bit to keep him interested. Casually mention other guys but don’t make it obvious whether you’re dating them, and sound busy when you text.
Play it cool and act like you don’t care what he thinks, but avoid insulting him outright. Don’t ignore him if he’s upset; showing him you still care is important.

Part 1

Part 1 of 2:

Making Him Want You More

1
Don’t respond for a long time. One of the best ways to make a guy jealous over text requires you to do nothing at all. If he starts texting you, let at least a few hours go by before you give him an answer. If he texts you on a Friday or Saturday evening and you have no intentions of trying to meet up with him, then you can even get back to him the following day, leading him to wonder about how you spent your evening.^{[1]
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- Though you may be tempted to answer with something snippy or clever right away, you should wait at least an hour or two before you respond. This will keep him guessing. He may begin to wonder if you’re not getting back to him because you’re too busy with other guys.
- Pretend like you don't need him even though you do. If he feels like he can talk to you any time he wants, then he won’t think your time is so valuable.
- Alternatively, stop texting him.^{[2]
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  Expert Source
  
  Michele Fields
  Matchmaker & Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 17 August 2021.}
- The more you interact back and forth he will know he has got you.^{[3]
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  Expert Source
  
  Michele Fields
  Matchmaker & Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 17 August 2021.}
- If you disappear it will make him jealous.^{[4]
  X
  Expert Source
  
  Michele Fields
  Matchmaker & Dating Coach
  Expert Interview. 17 August 2021.}
2
Be mysterious about what you’re up to. When you do text him, don’t tell him about everything you have going on all weekend. Even if you’re only going to your grandfather’s birthday party, you can lead him to think you’re going on a hot date with the man of your dreams. Instead of revealing every little detail of your plans, just tell him that you’re busy, that you have something going on, or that you won’t be able to talk. Here are some subtle ways to make him jealous:^{[5]
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- “I have something to do later…”
- “I have a lot going on this weekend.”
- “I had such a long night last night! It was crazy.”
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3
Make it sound like you’re going on a date. You don’t have to tell the guy flat-out that you have some hot plans for the evening, but you can certainly make him think you do! With just a few careful words, you can lead his mind to wonder...and wonder.^{[6]
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Research source} Here are some things you can say to make him think you’re going on a date:
- “I’ll talk to you later. I need to get a new dress for tomorrow night.”
- “I had the most amazing pasta dish last night.”
- “I can’t believe how late I got home last night.”
- “I have to get going now…I’m meeting up with someone later.”
4
Flirt with him, but not too much. You should flirt with the guy a little bit to keep him interested and to show him that you’re ready to play ball. Give him just enough to see that you do like him a little bit without thinking he has you in the palm of his hands. Just a few casual compliments or comments at the right time can do the trick.^{[7]
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Expert Source

Mark Rosenfeld
Dating & Relationship Coach
Expert Interview. 11 June 2021.} Try saying something like this:
- “I have to say, you didn’t look half bad playing basketball yesterday.”
- “You always know what to say to make me feel better, don’t you?”
- “You can make me laugh over text, but I wonder if you can do it in person…”
5
Casually mention other guys. You don’t need to be so obvious about the fact that you’re hanging out with other guys—whether they are real or make-believe. Just a subtle hint or comment about another guy is all you need to make to get the guy you’re talking to worried about what you’ve got going on.^{[8]
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Research source} If you’re too heavy-handed about it, though, then the guy will see that you’re just bluffing. Here are some subtle ways to mention other guys:
- “This new guy I met is actually going to the concert with me.”
- “Nick gave me a ride to school yesterday…”
- “Bill let me borrow his record player for my party.”
6
Sound busy. Another way to make a guy jealous when you’re texting him is just to make it seem like you have a million things going on, whether you’re hanging out with guys or not. You could be really into your classes, your new summer job, your soccer team, one of your hobbies, or your friends and family, which will leave you not to have too much time to text the guy anyway. Let him see that you’ve got many other priorities, and he’ll be jealous that you have so many ways to spend your time that have nothing to do with him.
- Don’t just talk about how busy you are. Casually mention some of the things you do in your spare time, and he’ll be wishing he could spend more time with you.
- Your texts also don’t have to sound like you spent hours writing and proofreading them. Sending a text that isn’t totally crystal clear or has a typo or two in it shows that you’re too busy to try to really impress him.
7
Act like you don’t really care what he thinks. If he tries to make you jealous or to talk about other girls, just play it cool and don’t let him get a reaction out of you. He’ll see that you have the upper hand and that nothing he can say or do can make you jealous. This will make him a bit frustrated, but it will also make him feel more attached to you because he’ll be more determined than ever to win you over.
- If he doesn’t respond to your messages for a few hours, don’t text him asking what’s up. Wait for him to come to you.
8
Leave abruptly in the middle of a good conversation. Another way to make the guy jealous is to make it seem like you suddenly had to go just when things were getting interesting. If you leave a text conversation after things got pretty boring, then he’ll think you just lost interest;^{[9]
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Research source} but if you’re having a great talk and then you suddenly say that you have to get going, then he’s more likely to get jealous because he’ll think that you ran into another guy or are getting picked up for a date.
- Also, leaving in the middle of a great conversation will make the guy realize how fun and easy it is to talk to you.

Part 2

Part 2 of 2:

Knowing What Not to Do

1
Don’t insult him. While you may want to make the guy jealous, you don’t want to end up hurting his feelings so much that he stops talking to you. You should still be respectful and shouldn’t make fun of how he looks, how much money he makes, or how physically inadequate he is in some way. This will make a guy lose interest fast, and it will also make it more likely that he’d tell other guys to steer clear of you. Here are some things you should avoid texting:
- “Ugh, you’re so gross.”
- “I’m so sick of jerks like you.”
2
Don’t compare him to other guys. Though you can make a guy jealous by mentioning that you’re hanging out with other guys or even hinting at the fact that you’re going on a hot date, you don’t want to start talking about how much better all of the guys around you are than the guy you’re texting. After all, you do want him to like you, and if you take it too far, he’ll just think you’re mean. Here are some things you should avoid saying:
- “All of the guys here are so much hotter than you.”
- “I just went on a date with a guy who makes twice as much money as you do.”
- “Why can’t you dress more like Joe? He looked so cute in his new jeans today.”
3
Don’t be so cold that he thinks you don’t like him. Though you can’t put all of your feelings out there if you want to play hard to get, you don’t want to be so coy that the guy has no idea that you actually like him or care for him. You have to give him something to hang on to or he’ll start texting girls that he actually thinks he has a chance with. You can be subtle and still let him know that you care about him. Here are some simple things you can say to keep him interested:
- “I missed you at the Radiohead concert last night. It would have been so much more fun with you there.”
- “You always know how to crack me up.”
- “It’s great to hear from you. I’ve had such a long day.”
4
Don’t insult the girls he’s with. Though you may think that putting down any of the girls he’s with will only make you look better or will make him doubt his other romantic choices, in reality, this will only make you look insecure and not worth the guy’s time. If he’s telling you he’s hanging out with other girls, you can just act like you don’t really care or say something nice about them to show that you’re confident enough not to care if he’s with other ladies.
- You should really be the bigger person and say something nice about a girl he’s with instead of putting her down. If he mentions a girl he’s hanging out with, you can say something simple like, “Oh, I love Jackie. That girl always cracks me up.”
5
Don’t ignore him completely if he sounds really upset. Though you may think that not texting him back for two days is the best way to win the guy over, in reality, if you take it too far, he’ll actually just get angry and will lose interest or may even start to actively dislike you. If he really wants your help or has an important question for you and you’re ignoring him just because you want to prove a point, then that will give him the wrong impression.
- Sure, being coy and seeming like you’re too busy to respond to him ASAP is one thing, but if you take it so far that he feels like you’re just being mean, then you may lose him.
- Try to get a sense of the tone of his message. Is he just being playful, a little impatient, or really needing to hear from you?
6
Don’t play too many games. Of course, it can be fun to play games and to get a guy to be interested in you by making him jealous while you’re texting. Playing games in person, too, can be a great way to capture his attention. However, if you really want to start building a relationship with this guy, then eventually you have to let him see that you really do care for him and that none of the other guys matter. This is the only way to really move forward with him.
- Though playing hard to get and keeping a guy on his toes can help move a relationship forward and will keep things interesting, you don’t want to spend too much time trying to make a guy jealous over text if you want to begin a genuine relationship with him.^{[10]
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Sample Texts to Make a Guy Jealous

Warnings

Be careful not to look desperate or as if you are purposefully trying to make him jealous. Use your best judgment.

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This could make you seem nasty and could have the opposite effect.

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If the guy figures out you are trying to make him jealous, stop doing it and apologise.

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