What Type of Woman Is an Alpha Male Attracted To? 18 Traits That Attract Alpha Males

Charming, attractive, and a natural leader, an alpha male is the guy everyone’s after. If you have your eyes set on him, you’ll have to prove you’re his equal and have a ton to offer. That’s just perfect, because you bring so much to the table! This article will share what traits to show off so he'll realize he needs you. Read on if you want to know what type of woman an alpha male is attracted to—focus on these tips and you’ll definitely capture his heart!

This article is based on an interview with our certified image consultant, Lynda Jean, owner of Lynda Jean Image Consulting. Check out the full interview here.

1

She’s always loyal.

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    When you prioritize others, you’ll earn an alpha male’s trust. Put your friends, family, and loved ones first. Talk about why they’re at the top of your list, and why you will always stand up for them. When you’re serious about the people close to your heart, he’ll instantly see you as girlfriend or wife material. You can tell him something like:[1]
    • “Whenever my bestie needs me, I’ll always be there for her.”
    • “Family is number one for me. I want to be the best daughter I can.”
    • “I date one man at a time and give him my full focus.”[2]
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2

She’s effortlessly confident.

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    If you always hold your head up high, he’ll want you around all the time. Keep a smile on your face and show off your friendly attitude.[3] Prove that you can make friends easily and treat anyone you meet with lots of kindness. When you look happy with yourself in any situation, he’ll be hypnotized.[4]
    • If you’re on a date at a restaurant, be really nice and polite to the employees.
    • Ask people for their names and talk about what they’re interested in.
    • When you’re at a party, get involved in all the activities and compliment everyone.
3

She’s observant.

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    If you stay curious about the world, he’ll want to learn more from you. Ask small questions right as they pop up in your head. Also dig deep and share what you’re an expert on. He’ll be dazzled by all the details you bring up. You can grab his attention with something like:[5]
    • “Who gets to decide what a ‘guilty pleasure’ is?”
    • “I met a fortune teller in the city today. I read up on famous ‘psychics’ in history after that…”
    • “I just put together my crypto portfolio today. Here’s what I think about the market prices…”
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4

She’s intelligent.

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    If you learn skills quickly, he’ll work to keep up with you. Always be on the lookout for new activities and fun challenges. Concentrate and put a lot of effort in when you test yourself. You’ll pick up new abilities in no time, and you’ll make his jaw drop.[6]
    • Brush up on a new subject and kick off a debate. Give it your all, but keep it friendly, too!
    • Learn how to speed read and summarize ideas right away. He’ll be shocked and impressed.
    • Face off in a new game. It can be athletic, like tennis, or goofy, like charades. If you beat him, he’ll definitely remember you.
5

She’s elegant and stylish.

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    If you create a wardrobe you’re proud of, he’ll stop to admire you. Wear your absolute favorite outfits, and enhance all the features you love. You can wear either minimal or really dramatic makeup. All that counts is what you’re comfortable with. When you paint a story with your fashion, he’ll adore how creative and well put together you are.[7]
    • He can be attracted to any body type. He’ll focus on how unique and authentic your style is.[8]
    • Really eye-catching fashion can be inexpensive. Just buy a few well-made pieces or go to clothing swaps.
    • Create a go-to “uniform.” Maybe you’ll pair sweaters with pencil skirts or tailored jackets with jeans. That way, you can throw on great looks really quickly. [9]
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6

She’s witty and funny.

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    If you laugh at life and yourself, he’ll know you can make him smile. Point out weird situations and try out different types of humor, like sarcasm or puns. If you are really bold and make a joke about yourself, he’ll be impressed. Plus, he’ll know that he can count on you to keep a connection silly and upbeat. You can charm him with something like:[10]
    • “Is this made from scratch? Totally…I scratched off the label so it would look nice. You’re welcome!”
    • “Hey, this jacket feels nice. Was there a sale on boyfriend material?”
    • “I know! So many puns. Dealing with me is the worst pun-ishment ever.”
7

She’s secure in herself.

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    If you’re cool with every part of yourself, he’ll embrace you, too. Be honest with him about what you’re proud of and what you’d like to improve on. For example, maybe you’re an awesome hostess but you still want to learn how to cook. When you’re super transparent, he’ll picture you as a partner who would never hide anything. You can tell him something like:[11]
    • “Ha ha! My roommate just texted me to keep it down. I’ll work on not talking so loud, but I’ll always be passionate about breaking down superhero flicks!”
    • “I know I always bring it when I sit down to work on my projects, but I wish I procrastinated a little less…”
    • “I made you this gift basket of every meat jerky imaginable! I’m really crafty, but sometimes my ideas are pretty out there…”[12]
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8

She’s calm and collected.

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    If you respond well to pressure, he’ll know you can handle anything. Talk about some of the challenges you face, then explain how you’ll work through them. If anything makes you tired or worried, it’s okay to admit it. As long as he knows you have an action plan, he’ll look up to you because you’re so prepared.[13]
    • Share how you kept your cool. For example, you can say, “I didn’t appreciate how they spoke to me, so I focused on conflict management."
    • Weigh pros and cons. For instance, you can say, “It’s expensive to go back to school, but I worked out a budget and calculated the salary I’d get after my degree.”
    • Also share any ways you lower stress. Maybe you exercise or meditate.
9

She’s polite but assertive.

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    If you express your boundaries, he’ll learn about your needs. Tell both him and others what you’re most excited about and what your limits are.[14] If you ever feel people ask too much from you, feel free to say “no.” He’ll admire that you know exactly how much you can give and that you protect your energy. You can stand up for yourself and say something like:[15]
    • “I’d be happy to help you decorate for your party! I’m free that weekend.”
    • “I can’t come over tonight. I have to go to bed early because I have a meeting tomorrow.”
    • “I won’t be able to speak at the convention. I can’t prepare a presentation in three days.”
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10

She’s highly motivated.

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    If it’s easy for you to get inspired, he’ll be amazed by your enthusiasm. Share all the reasons you get out of bed and start your day. For example, maybe you jog every morning for your health. You can also talk about outside influences. For instance, maybe you really want to impress your boss. When you talk about what drives you, he’ll love the fire inside you. You can show off your discipline and say something like:[16]
    • “I have to wake up really early to teach, but the kids totally make it worth it.”
    • “I thought I’d never be able to use a squat rack, but after a year of hard work, I built up my strength. Now, I can deadlift without breaking a sweat!”
    • “I think community service is really important, so I volunteer at the local animal shelter.”
11

She’s focused on her future.

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    If you’re excited about next steps, he’ll be hooked on your optimism. Tell him where you see yourself in 5-10 years. Then, explain all the smart decisions you’ve made right that will lead to the results you want. Also talk about past successes and how you’ll recreate them. When you have an ambitious vision, he’ll see you can make anything happen. You can thrill him and say something like:[17]
    • “In 5 years, I’ll be a gymnastics coach. Then, I’ll make sure my teams excel every season!”
    • “I’ve built an awesome professional network over the past 3 years. That’ll be really important for my startup company.”
    • “I’ve operated a successful bakery before, so I know I can do it again!”
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12

She’s adventurous.

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    If you love spontaneity, then he’ll know you’re full of surprises. Start off with random gestures. For example, you can pop over one day with take-out from the best brunch spot in town. Then, be a little more extravagant. For instance, you can book a getaway or sign yourselves up for a fun activity, like archery lessons. Your originality will leave him breathless.[18]
    • Treat him to random gifts, too. For example, you can get him a watch that’s just his style.
    • Throw in some unexpected spice. Show up at his door in a long coat and lingerie.
    • Spend a whole day where you just listen to him. He’ll value all the special attention.
13

She’s passionate.

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    If you keep the spark alive, he’ll know your romance will stay hot. Create some fun tension with him. When you’re on dates with him, make sure to laugh, touch him, look deeply into his eyes, and flirt with him the whole time.[19] Also tell him about the great “love story” you two would make together. You can make him swoon and say something like:[20]
    • "You’re the most exciting person I’ve ever met. Thinking about a life with you makes my heart race.”
    • “You’re insanely creative. I know we’ll create tons of magic together, and that lights me up.”
    • "You’re so giving. You make me want to dote on you all the time. You deserve it!”
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14

She’s a great communicator.

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    If you put effort into your talks, he’ll know you take your connection seriously. Ask him what he needs from a relationship, listen closely, and then share how you’ll support him.[21] After you’ve focused on him, explain what you want. He’ll appreciate how clear you are. Smile, put your hand on his knee or shoulder, lean forward, and say something like:[22]
    • “I totally get that you want a relationship where we’re both independent. I’ll make sure we have quality time and also focus on our own goals.”
    • “It sounds like we both really prize a partnership where we feel appreciated. It’s great that we share that in common!”
    • “I really need someone who sees the best in me. That makes me happy and pushes me to achieve more.”
15

She’s incredibly patient.

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    Take time to resolve problems and he'll know you're healthy together. If any conflict comes up, calmly address it before you react to it. Point out what you think bothers either you or him, then suggest how you can fix the issue. He’ll have a lot of faith in you and know he can turn to you for answers. You can offer a compromise and say something like:[23]
    • “I know I’ve spent a lot of time at work. Let me schedule some dates for us right now.”
    • “I was bummed when you didn’t call, but I trust you. Can you come over, cuddle, and watch a movie soon? I’d love your company.”
    • “I think both of us didn’t get enough sleep. Why don’t we nap and catch up later?”
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16

She’s supportive.

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    If you value personal growth, he’ll feel motivated. Tell him how important you think his goals are, and remind him that you believe in him.[24] Also point out when you see him make healthy changes. For example, maybe you suddenly see him meal prep or take online classes. When you’re his biggest fan, he’ll want you to keep cheering him on. You can give him a compliment like:[25]
    • “I think it’s awesome that you’re applying for that position! You’re so qualified.”
    • “That’s great that you’re taking night classes! I love that you’re always learning new skills.”
    • “Look at all the chess tutorials in your queue! You’re always up for a new challenge. I love it.”
17

She’s warm and caring.

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    If you’re affectionate and vulnerable, he’ll melt and invest in you. Whether you’ve known each other for a while or just kicked things off recently, he’ll notice your openness right away. When you feel sentimental, give him lots of hugs and caresses. If you have strong emotions, share them.[26] He’ll be stunned by your transparency and feel extremely close to you. You can put your heart on your sleeve and say something like:[27]
    • “I just adore this date and how fun you are! I have to give you a hug now.”
    • “I feel so close to you every time we hang out. I’m really growing attached to you.”
    • “I’ve never felt anything quite like this. I feel safe and understood around you.”
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18

She’s loving and accepting.

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    If you embrace all sides of him, he’ll be totally devoted to you. Explain that you’re impressed with all the work he puts into himself.[28] If he’s talked about any obstacles in his life, reassure him and say he can handle them. When he knows you’re always on his side, he’ll want to settle down and even think about love. You can warm his heart and say something like: [29]
    • “It’s okay to have rough patches. I’ll always be here for you. I promise.”
    • “Thank you for sharing that with me. I feel like I know you ever better, and I’m even more excited about this connection.”
    • “You are the most amazing person I’ve ever met. I cherish you.”

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References

  1. ↑ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/be-mine-forever-oxytocin/
  2. ↑ https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167216646546
  3. ↑ Lisa Shield. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 11 March 2021.
  4. ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/travisbradberry/2015/04/01/12-things-truly-confident-people-do-differently/?sh=63c7dcf64766
  5. ↑ https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20120618-why-are-we-so-curious
  6. ↑ https://balance.media/smart-attractive/
  7. ↑ https://www.vogue.com/article/unpacking-the-effortless-cool-of-french-girl-beauty?utm_source=VOGUE_REG_GATE
  8. ↑ Lisa Shield. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 11 March 2021.
  9. ↑ https://www.harpersbazaar.com/uk/fashion/what-to-wear/a14587839/how-to-be-more-stylish/
  1. ↑ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/the-humor-gap-2012-10-23/
  2. ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/adult-health/in-depth/self-esteem/art-20047976
  3. ↑ Lisa Shield. Dating Coach. Expert Interview. 11 March 2021.
  4. ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/communication-success/201308/how-stay-cool-under-pressure
  5. ↑ Lynda Jean. Certified Image Consultant. Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.
  6. ↑ https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/-/media/CCI/Consumer-Modules/Assert-Yourself/Assert-Yourself---06---How-to-Say-No-Assertively.pdf
  7. ↑ https://time.com/4245079/motivation-habit/
  8. ↑ https://er.educause.edu/articles/2019/3/five-principles-for-thinking-like-a-futurist
  9. ↑ https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/relationships/a9994022/how-to-be-spontaneous-relationship/
  10. ↑ Lynda Jean. Certified Image Consultant. Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.
  11. ↑ https://www.apa.org/monitor/feb07/eternal
  12. ↑ Lynda Jean. Certified Image Consultant. Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.
  13. ↑ https://www.waldenu.edu/programs/communication/resource/how-to-be-an-effective-communicator-in-7-easy-steps
  14. ↑ https://au.reachout.com/articles/managing-the-pressures-of-a-relationship
  15. ↑ Lynda Jean. Certified Image Consultant. Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.
  16. ↑ https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0146167210383045
  17. ↑ Lynda Jean. Certified Image Consultant. Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.
  18. ↑ https://opentextbc.ca/socialpsychology/chapter/close-relationships-liking-and-loving-over-the-long-term/
  19. ↑ Lynda Jean. Certified Image Consultant. Expert Interview. 17 November 2020.
  20. ↑ https://www.wired.co.uk/article/what-is-love

About This Article

Lynda Jean
Written by:
Lynda Jean
Certified Image Consultant
This article was written by Lynda Jean and by wikiHow staff writer, Madeleine Flamiano. Lynda Jean is an Image Consultant and the Owner of Lynda Jean Image Consulting. With over 15 years of experience, Lynda specializes in color and body/style analysis, wardrobe audits, personal shopping, social and professional etiquette, and personal and business branding. She works with clients to enhance their image, self-esteem, behavior, and communication to facilitate their social and career goals. Lynda holds Bachelor degrees in Sociology and Social Work, a Master’s degree in Clinical Social Work, and a Certified Image Consultant (CIC) certification. She studied Image Consulting at the International Image Institute and the International Academy of Fashion and Technology in Toronto, Canada. Lynda has taught Image Consulting courses at George Brown College in Toronto, Canada. She is the co-author of the book, “Business Success With Ease,” where she shares her knowledge about, ‘The Power of Professional Etiquette.’ This article has been viewed 15,396 times.
6 votes - 37%
Co-authors: 8
Updated: May 21, 2022
Views: 15,396
Categories: Relationships
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