How to Tell if a Guy in Middle School Likes You

Co-authored by Joshua Pompey

Last Updated: February 1, 2023 References Approved

Sometimes it can be really hard to tell if a guy likes you or not! Lots of people get butterflies or feel nervous around their crush, and that can make it tough to figure out if he’s interested in you or just sees you as a friend. Learning how to watch his body language, verbal cues, and his interactions with you will help you figure out if he likes you back!

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Noticing His Body Language

1
Check if he looks at you often. Do you ever glance over at him and catch him staring at you? If you do, there is hope that he likes you. Be careful not to look at him too much--he might just be looking at you because you’re staring at him!^{[1]
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Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert
Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.}
2
See if he smiles at you often. If he is smiling at you a lot, he probably likes you. Think about the last time you saw him. If he smiled at you often and for no real reason, there’s a good chance he’s interested in you.^{[2]
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Expert Source

Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert
Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.}

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3
Notice where he sits. Guys don’t go out of their way to sit next to people they don’t like. If he often sits beside you or close to you when he doesn’t have to, he likes you.^{[3]
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- Try getting to class or lunch really early and sitting down before everyone else. If he goes out of his way to sit near you, that’s a good sign!
- He might be a little too shy to sit next to you. Check to see if he sits nearby instead!
4
See if he tries to touch you. If he touches you or reaches towards you while you’re talking, he probably likes you! Tickling, poking, hugging, and tapping your shoulder are all signs he’s interested in being more than friends.^{[4]
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Expert Source

Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert
Expert Interview. 27 November 2019.}
- If you don’t like him touching you, don’t be afraid to say so. It’s important to stand up for yourself.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Talking to Him

1
Check if he seems nervous around you. A guy who laughs, stutters, makes weird jokes, or avoids eye contact when you talk is probably nervous around you. A lot of middle school boys are really nervous around girls they like, so this is a good sign!^{[5]
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2
See if he tries to join your conversations. Do you ever find him butting into your conversations with a friend? This could mean he is trying to spark a conversation with you and wants to talk. Let him! Joke around a bit to let him know you accept him.^{[6]
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3
Watch to see if he tries to talk to your friends. Is he coming up often and talking to your friends but not necessarily you? He may be working his way around to you, and using your friends as the excuse to be nearby.^{[7]
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- It can be hard to tell if he likes you or just likes your friend. If he talks to the same friend every time, he probably likes them. But if he talks to a different friend every time, he might like you!
4
See if he talks to you for no reason. If you never really talked before but he’s suddenly interested in chatting with you, that’s a really good sign that he likes you. A good way to tell is if he makes excuses to start conversations with you, like asking for a pencil when you’re on the other side of the room.^{[8]
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5
Look for compliments in his conversation. People usually don’t say nice things about people they don’t like. If he’s giving you compliments when he doesn’t have to, he is probably interested in you!^{[9]
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- For example, things like "I really liked your presentation" or "That jacket looks nice on you" might indicate that he likes you.
6
Ask him if he likes you. This takes some courage, but if you’re already talking to him and he’s showing a lot of signs of liking you, it’s okay to just ask! He might get embarrassed, but if he really likes you, he’ll say so.^{[10]
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- You can just say “I like you a lot. Do you like me?” It’s best to tell him you like him too first, otherwise, he might think you’re making fun of him.
- If he avoids answering or even says no, just play it off as a joke. You can say “Just kidding!” and change the subject.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Recognizing Flirtatious Behavior

1
Check if you see him nearby all of a sudden. If he starts showing up where ever you are, he may be following you to find a good time to talk to you. Many boys are shy about talking to people they like, so he might be compensating by just being near you.^{[11]
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2
Ask yourself if he acts differently around you. If he treats you exactly the same as he treats everyone else, there may not be something there. But if he’s usually outgoing but can’t talk to you, or if he’s a tough guy around his friends but asks you how you’re feeling, there’s a good chance he’s interested.^{[12]
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3
See if he tries to compete with you. Have you ever found him trying to race you in gym or compete with you on quizzes? Lots of guys try to get to know someone by competing with him. If he’s interested in competition with you, he probably likes you.^{[13]
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- Don’t be tempted to let him win all the time! Be true to yourself. Changing for another person is never worth it.
4
Watch how he responds when you are with another guy. If he acts upset or hurt when you spend time with another guy, it might be a sign of his interest in you. If you happen to be talking with another guy while he’s nearby, watch to see how he reacts.^{[14]
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- Don’t try to make him jealous on purpose--it’s manipulative and could scare him away.
- Be careful around guys who overreact when you’re with someone else. It’s okay if they’re just hurt or a little jealous, but if they get angry, yell at you or him, or throw a tantrum, it could be a sign of controlling behavior.
5
See if he gives you a gift. Lots of guys like to give their crush presents. If he gives you anything, even if it’s something small like a sticker or a pencil, he probably likes you and is trying to get you to like him too.^{[15]
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- Don’t accept anything really lavish, like electronics or money. Just tell him you’d rather get to know him as a person instead.

Expert Q&A
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Question

How do you know if a boy likes you at school?

Joshua Pompey
Relationship Expert
Joshua Pompey is a Relationship Expert with over 10 years of helping people navigate the online dating world. Joshua has run his own relationship consulting business since 2009 at a success rate of over 99%. His work has been featured in CNBC, Good Morning America, Wired, and Refinery29 and he has been referred to as the best online dater in the world.

Joshua Pompey

Relationship Expert

Expert Answer

Support wikiHow by unlocking this expert answer.

If they make a lot of eye contact with you or you catch them staring at you when you aren't looking, it's a pretty good sign they're interested in you. Also, if they go out of your way to talk to you or they text you randomly, they may have a crush on you. The biggest sign is if they randomly touch you by brushing against your elbow, putting their hand on your back, or going out of their way to hug you. This is a sure sign that they're interested.
Question

What do I do if he looks away immediately when I turn around to look at him? Like he looks really shy and he is. I never see him talk to girls at all, what should I do? In class, I'm the quietest one.

Community Answer

He's probably embarrassed that you caught him looking! If he's quiet too it might be hard to get to know him, but give it a shot!
Question

If my crush worries about me when I'm by myself, tells me that I'm the only person he can stand in the school, and always asks (only me) for help, could he like me?

Community Answer

He probably really likes you. If he thinks about you when you aren't around and tells you you're the only person he likes, that's a sign that he's interested. It may also be a sign that he's very clingy, so be careful!