Questions to Ask a Girl to Increase Intimacy

Whether she's your crush or your girlfriend, asking flirty questions is a great way to grow closer together

Co-authored by Shana Tibi and Dev Murphy

Last Updated: March 20, 2023

Whether you’re chatting a cute girl up on Snapchat or text or you’re talking face-to-face, a flirty question is a great way to get you both giggling and blushing, or just help you get a little more intimate. Looking for some inspiration? Look no further! We’ve compiled a list of flirty questions to ask a girl.

1

Questions to Ask Your Crush

Find out what dating her might be like based on her answers. If you’re interested in starting a relationship with this girl, find out what she’s looking for by asking her about her dating history, preferences, and goals for the future. Is it practical? Yes. But who said practical isn’t sexy? These questions can tell you a lot about how she operates in relationships, and it's also sure to increase sexual tension between you both.
- “How did your last relationship end?”
- “Who was your first crush?”
- “What’s your biggest dealbreaker in a relationship?”^{[1]
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- "If I could take you out right now, where would you want to go?"
- “What is your love language?”
- "Do you believe in love at first sight?"
- “What is your biggest turn-on?”^{[2]
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- “What is your biggest turn-off?”
- “Do you like to make the first move?”
- “Do you think you're a good kisser?”^{[3]
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- “What’s your biggest regret from your last relationship?”
- “Have you ever been in love?”
- “What was your first impression of me?”
- “Are you the big spoon or little spoon?”
- “Do you like sharing a bed with someone?”
- “How soon into a relationship would you want to meet my family?”
- “Do you like to be complimented?”
- "Are you willing to try new things?"
- “What type of personality are you attracted to?”
- “When was your first kiss?”
- “What are your thoughts on open relationships/non-monogamy?”
- “What attracts you to me?”
- “Of all the questions I could ask you, what wouldn’t you want me to ask?”^{[4]
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2

Questions to Make Her Blush

Ask these sexy questions to get her all hot and bothered. Odds are, you’ll get hot and bothered too. These flirty questions won’t just make her blush; they’ll also tell you a lot about her sexual preferences and improve physical intimacy between you both.
- “What’s your favorite place to be kissed?”
- “What’s the hottest memory of the two of us?”
- "What physical feature do you find most attractive in another person?"
- “Lights on or lights off?”
- "Do you enjoy French kissing?"
- “How can I keep the physical intimacy between us strong throughout the day, outside of the bedroom?”^{[5]
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- “Fiery and fast, or slow and sensual?”
- “What are your thoughts on sexting?”
- “What’s your biggest fantasy?”
- "Is the third date too soon for Netflix and chill?"
- "Have you ever sent dirty text messages?"
- “Where and how do you like to be touched?”^{[6]
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3

Questions to Get to Know Her

Get a girl to open up by asking lighthearted questions about her. What better way to learn more about someone than by asking fun and flirty questions about her likes and dislikes, her personality, and her old AIM username? If you’ve only recently begun talking to this girl, these fun but evocative questions are great ways to break the ice and give you the opportunity to get a little flirty.
- "What is something about you that people would never guess?"
- “What music do you listen to?”
- “What does an ideal weekend look like for you?”
- “What are your thoughts on long-distance dating?”
- "How on earth are you still single?"
- “What is your biggest fear?”
- “How do you feel about astrology?”
- “What are your thoughts on who picks up the check?”
- “If you had to live in a different city, where would you go?”
- “What is the worst movie you’ve ever seen on a date?”
- “What was your AIM screen name?”
- “Tell me something on your bucket list.”
- “Early riser or night owl?”
- “How do you wind down after work?”
- “What is your biggest pet peeve?”
- “What’s the most spontaneous thing you’ve ever done?”^{[7]
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- “Coffee or tea?”
- “What’s the last concert you’ve been to?”^{[8]
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- “Do you consider yourself to be romantic?”

4

Deep Questions to Ask a Girl

Peel back her layers by getting her input on deep topics. Flirting is fun and sexy, and it’s also an amazing way to get to know someone you might be interested in pursuing a relationship with. Ask your girl these questions to build some intimacy and learn a little bit more about who she is beneath the surface.
- “Do you see yourself having kids one day?”
- “What’s your biggest regret?”
- “What makes you feel safe?”
- “What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever been through?”
- “What's your relationship with your family?”
- “If you could reconnect with one person from your past, who would it be?”
- “What’s a bad habit you had that you’ve overcome?”^{[9]
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- “What is your happiest childhood memory?”
- “What is something people usually misunderstand about you?”
- “When you are upset, do you want support or alone time?”
- “Have you been to therapy?”
- “Which parent are you closest to?”
- “What's something no one knows about you?”
- “What’s one thing you would say to your younger self?”
- “What would you do if you got a chance to repeat life all over again?”
- “What’s something you will never give up or change for me?”
- “What is your favorite thing about yourself?”^{[10]
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- “What is one moment in your life you would love to relive?”
- “Do you see yourself getting married one day?”
- “What’s the best advice you’ve ever gotten?”^{[11]
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