How to Plan a Romantic Evening

Co-authored by Alysha Jeney, MA, LMFT

Last Updated: August 25, 2022 Approved

Romantic dates can revitalize your relationship and increase the intimacy between you and your partner. Make your evening a success by thinking about what your partner likes and planning accordingly. Small, thoughtful touches can make your night together memorable and romantic.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Scheduling Your Evening

1
Start early. Get an early start by looking ahead and planning in advance. People get busy and schedules get filled up, so it is best to start planning at least a month ahead of time. This is especially important if the romantic evening is for an anniversary or other special occasion. Begin considering activities and thinking about special moments that your partner will enjoy.
2
Pick a time and date. Look at both of your schedules and find a good day. If you know that your loved one is exhausted during the workweek, plan it for the weekend instead. To ensure you will both be free for your romantic evening, make sure to mark it on both of your calendars.

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3
Invite your partner or surprise them. Decide whether you want the evening to be a surprise for your partner, or if you would like them to know about it ahead of time. If you would like them to know, you can simply invite them by saying something like, “I was thinking we could do something special for our anniversary. Would you like to go out for a special evening?”
- If you would like to surprise your partner, you can have a friend help you and schedule a fake outing for that day so that your partner won’t have anything else going on. For example, your friend could plan an activity with you and your partner on that same day and then cancel at the last minute, ensuring your partner’s availability without giving away your romantic plans.
4
Think about your partner’s preferences. Make sure that this evening will be about your partner. Think about what he or she likes, including food, places, and activities. This will help you to plan a memorable evening that your partner is sure to enjoy.^{[1]
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- You could make a list of some of your partner’s favorite things and find a way to include them in your evening. For example, if your partner loves nature, you could make sure that your romantic evening includes a walk on the beach.
5
Decide whether you would like to go out or stay in. Note that there are two types of romantic evenings. The first type is to do something special at home and the second type is to plan an evening out. Both can be great for a romantic date with your loved one. To make this decision, consider whether your partner generally enjoys going out or staying in. You want them to be comfortable.
- Staying at home is a good choice so that you will have privacy and not be distracted by other people.
- Going out is a good choice because it can make for a special evening by doing something out of the ordinary.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Going Out

1
Pick a restaurant. Choose a place that you know your partner likes. Maybe there is a restaurant that has sentimental value, like where you had your first date. If this isn’t an option, choose a place that serves the kind of food your partner enjoys, like a French restaurant. It should be some place that is fancier than where you would normally eat, but you don’t have to pay hundreds of dollars. You should be able to get a quality dinner for two that costs under $100, but if you want to splurge on something extra fancy, you can do that too.
- If you are trying somewhere new, read reviews first to make sure that people had a good experience there. You could look on Yelp to see how other people liked the restaurant.
- Look for a place with a romantic ambiance rather than a family-style dining place. It should be a restaurant where you will be able to talk and that has a good tone, like candlelit tables and tasteful artwork on the walls.
2
Make reservations. This is important so that you are sure they will be able to seat you that night. It will also keep you from having to wait for a very long time at a busy place. Simply call the restaurant ahead of time and tell them when you need the table reserved.
- Planning ahead and making a reservation is an actionable and romantic way to say, “I care about you.”
3
Choose an additional activity. Besides sharing a romantic meal with your loved one, you can plan something for after dinner. You could take your partner out dancing or to a jazz club or to a movie or to live theatre. Think about the activities your partner enjoys and the interests your partner has and choose a special event for after you eat.
- Depending on where you go, you may need to buy tickets in advance.
- You could also keep it low key and simply take a moonlit walk together.
4
Book a hotel room. If you wish to spend the night with your partner out of the house, book a hotel room. Try to find some place nice, and be prepared to spend at least $100, perhaps even $300 depending on the city you are in. It doesn’t need to be a 5-star hotel, but look for one that is tasteful and elegant, perhaps something like a Marriott.^{[2]
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5
Buy a gift. If you wish, you could buy your partner a gift to show your affection. Flowers, jewelry, and chocolate are always a good bet. You could get something more personal like a picture frame with a nice photo of the two of you. You could even make a gift, like a CD of romantic songs. Getting your partner a gift is a nice touch that they will surely appreciate.
6
Plan your outfit. Make sure to wear something special to look your best for your partner. Depending on where you go, guys could wear a nice suit and girls could wear a knee-length dress. Dressing well helps make the evening special and your partner will appreciate the effort you put into looking your best.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Staying In

1
Choose a meal to prepare. Most romantic evenings will involve some type of food. Make sure to think of something that you know your partner likes. Be sure to keep it simple because you don’t want to spend your whole evening trying to cook! Find a dish that you know how to make, that your partner loves, and that will require minimal preparation.^{[3]
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- You could have a mediterranean-style dinner with bread, cheese, olives, ham, grapes, and salad. It is elegant and requires very little preparation.
- Don’t plan any meal that will be too heavy or you won’t feel very romantic afterwards. The same goes for spicy foods.
2
Decide which drinks you will enjoy. You could choose a nice bottle of wine for dinner, like a Tempranillo from La Rioja, or even a fun cocktail, like a Tom Collins. A bottle of Champagne can be very romantic. For something non-alcoholic, you could go with sparkling water, sparkling grape juice, or fresh squeezed juice. Having a fancy beverage will help the night feel special.^{[4]
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3
Pick a special dessert. Choose something that your partner will enjoy. You could have a fondue-style dessert and dip strawberries in melted chocolate. This requires very little preparation, is delicious, and is something special that you wouldn’t do every day. It’s these special touches that will make your romantic evening memorable.
4
Choose music to listen to. Take into account your partner’s preferences, but choose something that is light and have it playing quietly in the background. You could play some smooth jazz, like Billie Holiday, to set the tone.
- You could make a playlist or stream music, just make sure there won’t be any commercials, which will damper the ambiance.
5
Set the tone with candles or a fireplace. Lighting is a big part of a romantic evening. It also shows that you made special effort. You could dim the lights and have a candlelit dinner and then sit by the fireplace for desert or drinks.^{[5]
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- Just make sure to use caution when dealing with open flames. There is nothing less romantic than setting your house on fire!
6
Include another activity. Besides eating and conversing, have something else planned. Maybe you could watch a movie together, like The Princess Bride, or you could plan a romantic massage. Having a couple of other activities will help you to enjoy each other’s company for the whole evening.
7
Decorate the bedroom. Make the environment special and different from your normal sleeping arrangements. You could put rose petals on the bed, light candles, and set out a vase of flowers. This will help set the ambiance.^{[6]
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Warnings

Don’t make your plan too important. Let there be moments of spontaneity and let the evening go in whichever direction it goes. There’s no need to force a plan. Simply enjoy your partner’s company.

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Do not bring up anything that will stress out your partner or damper the ambiance.

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Don't get distracted by anything. Make sure to turn your phone off.

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