How to Make Your Husband Miss You

Last Updated: March 25, 2022 References

While separation can be challenging in a relationship, it can also help both parties understand how important the relationship is to them. Whether you are trying to survive a long-distance relationship or your marriage is on the rocks, making your husband miss you a bit can help reinvigorate your romance. Regardless of your situation, working to improve your relationship will make him more likely to miss you whenever you're apart.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Making Your Husband Miss You While You're Apart

1
Leave him sweet surprises. Your husband will miss you tons if he's always finding little reminders of you while you are apart. Before your next separation, consider hiding little treasures for him to discover. They can be anything from notes to photos of the two of you or other tokens of your affection.^{[1]
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- If your husband is going away, you can leave him love notes in his suitcase or in the pockets of his clothing. Try to put them in places where he will discover them at different times.
- If you are leaving home, hide things around the house for him to find. They can be notes or small mementos of your affection, like his favorite chocolate.
2
Make your phone calls more personal. Phone conversations tend to be centered around recounting daily activities. While this is fine, it's not the kind of conversation that will make your husband miss you. Instead, try to think of the kinds of conversations you have in person, and recreate these over the phone.^{[2]
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- Share something personal about yourself during each phone call. For example, you might tell your husband about something interesting you noticed today or about an activity you would like to try.
- You can also remind your husband of all of the things you love about him. For example, you might tell him that he's an excellent cuddler or that you love his laugh.
- While you may need to talk about household things, like bills or maintenance, be sure that they do no dominate the conversation. Balance them out by also talking about enjoyable topics. For example, you could tell your husband about a great movie that you saw, or you could discuss plans for a trip you plan to take together.
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3
Do things together. Instead of just talking on the phone and telling each other about your days, find ways to participate in activities together. This will help remind your husband of how enjoyable it is to be with you, even if you won't get the opportunity to see each other in person for a long time.^{[3]
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- For example, you could play an online game together, watch the same movie while talking to each other, or even bring each other to important events via video conference.
- If you get the chance to see your husband periodically, make that time count. You may choose to do activities together or just relax together, but no matter what you do, make sure that you both enjoy the time you have together.
4
Mix it up. It's easy to get into a rut when it comes to long-distance communication. For example, if you write your husband a letter every week or speak to him on the phone every evening, it can easily become routine. Keep your husband on his toes and looking forward to your next communication by doing something a little different every once in a while.^{[4]
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- For example, you might send your husband videos or silly cards at times. Alternatively, you might recite a poem that you wrote for him the next time you speak on the phone. Try to be a little unpredictable!
5
Avoid complaining about the separation. When you talk to your husband, try not to say anything that will make him feel bad about being apart. You want to make him miss you, and complaining about the burden he has left you with by leaving will do just the opposite.^{[5]
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- Instead of complaining, try offering him some sweet compliments. For example, you might let him know that something he fixed before he left is working very well. This will make him realize how much you appreciate him, which will intensify his feelings for you.^{[6]
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- If you are the one who is away from home, you could let him know that a joke he told you made you smile all day.
6
Make your reunions happy. If you want your husband to miss you while you are apart, it is vital that the time you spend together is as enjoyable as possible. Let him know that you value your time together, and he will too.^{[7]
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- Avoid bombarding him with a to-do list if he is coming home from a long trip. Instead, take a few days to spend quality time together doing things you both enjoy.
- If your husband is coming home from a military deployment, consider throwing him a welcome home party or meeting him at the airport with a welcome home banner.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Making Your Estranged Husband Miss You

1
Give him his space. Your husband will not have the opportunity to miss you if you are constantly seeing each other or talking to each other. Give him the chance to see what life would really be like without you by leaving him alone for a while.
- One of you will have to move out for this to work. If you have a friend or relative you can stay with, spend some time there. You can let your husband know that you hope the separation will only be temporary.
- Try this for about a month. This will give both of you adequate time to think about your relationship, and it will give him the time he needs to start missing you.
- It will be much easier to not contact your husband if you avoid checking up on him. You may want to unfollow him on social media so you won't be tempted to comment on his status updates. Don't ask mutual friends about how he is doing either.
2
Take care of yourself. Use your time apart to work on becoming the best version of yourself as you can. You may want to try to become more physically fit, work on your emotional stability, or expand your intellectual horizons. When you and your husband reunite, he will notice the difference and find it very attractive!^{[8]
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- In addition to making yourself more attractive to your husband, this will help you feel better about yourself. If the marriage doesn't end up working out, you will be in a much better position to get through it.
3
Get happy. You husband will be more likely to miss you if he sees that you are happy and fun to be around. Try socializing with friends and doing activities that you enjoy. When you and your husband begin communicating again, your happiness will be very enticing.^{[9]
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- Don't go out of your way to show him that you don't need him. Your goal should be to make him want to share in your happiness, not to make him resent you for it.
4
Remind him of happy times. Once you do start talking to your husband again, give him a reason to miss the happy times that you had together. Instead of focusing on the negatives of your relationship, try bringing up some of your favorite memories.^{[10]
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- There are many ways that you can remind him of happy memories. You could send him a photo from your honeymoon or reminisce about an adventure you had together, for example.
- You may want to consider talking to your husband about your desire to make more happy memories like the ones you have had in the past. If it feels right, have a conversation about the changes you can make to your relationship to help make that happen.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Improving Your Relationship With Your Husband

1
Think about his needs. Improving your relationship with your husband is the best way to make him genuinely miss you. You can start by considering his point of view instead of focusing only on your own. It's human nature to think about our own individual needs, but good husbands and wives also think about their partners' needs. Take some time to consider what your husband needs to be happy in life, and do your best to give it to him.^{[11]
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- For example, your husband may need some time to spend by himself pursuing a hobby, or he may need more quality time with you.
- If you're not sure what your husband's needs are, ask him what you can do to help him be happier.
2
Let him know you appreciate him. Your husband probably does a lot of little things for you every day. While it's easy to overlook all of these little things, acknowledging them and thanking him for them can go a long way in showing your husband how much you appreciate him. The next time he fixes something around the house or makes you breakfast, be sure to let him know that it means a lot to you.^{[12]
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Expert Source

Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
Licensed Psychologist
Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.}
- He may also really like it if you brag about him to others once in a while. For example, when you're out with friends, you might say, "My husband made me the most delicious dinner last night."
- Men don't respond well to criticism—they respond well to compliments and affirmation.^{[14]
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  Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
  Licensed Psychologist
  Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.}
- You might say "I'd love more of that" when your husband does something that you really like.^{[15]
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  Expert Source
  
  Sarah Schewitz, PsyD
  Licensed Psychologist
  Expert Interview. 15 April 2019.}
3
Talk about your conflicts. If you want him to think about you in a positive way, communicating well about conflicts is important. Every marriage has conflicts, and it's how a couple deals with those conflicts that determines how successful the relationship will be. If you want your marriage to be happy and healthy, keep the lines of communication open and discuss each and every conflict as it arises.
- Even if you need to take a break from a conversation, never leave it unfinished for long. Your goal should be to find a resolution that works for both of you.
- Listen to your husband and try to understand his perspective, even if you disagree.
- Be sure to say what you really mean, even if you think your husband may not like it. Dancing around the issue will not help resolve it.
4
Calm yourself down during arguments. Personally attacking your husband is the way to make him want to see less of you, not more. Sometimes small arguments can turn into big blowouts because emotions are running high. To avoid this, consider taking a short break from the conversation when you feel like you're about to start yelling. If you both have a little time to think, you may be much better able to talk rationally.^{[16]
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- The break can be a few minutes or an entire day, depending on how much time you need to cool down, but be sure to return to the conversation. You don't want to leave the conflict unresolved.
5
Avoid being defensive. When you find yourself in a disagreement with your husband, it's important to be open instead of defensive. This means resisting the urge to criticize your husband or his point of view.^{[17]
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- The less defensive you are during disagreements, the less defensive your husband will feel the need to be. This will make your conversations much more productive.
6
Move past mistakes. Both you and your husband are bound to make mistakes and hurt each other's feelings during the course of your marriage. When this happens, you have the choice to let the mistakes damage your marriage, or to let go of them and move on.^{[18]
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- It's important to forgive your husband for mistakes he has made in the past, as continuing to dwell on them will only create more tension in your marriage.
- You will make mistakes too, and when you do, you must be humble enough to admit it and apologize.