How to Get a Boy's Phone Number in Middle School

Co-authored by wikiHow Staff

Last Updated: January 13, 2023

When you like a boy, especially when you're in middle school, you might want to get his phone number so you can communicate with him outside of school. There are a number of ways to go about doing this. You simply need to decide which you're most comfortable with.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Getting His Attention

1
Use inviting body language. As you can imagine, it can be nerve-wracking for a guy to ask for your number or to ask you out, especially in middle school when girls are maturing faster than boys. If you want a guy to approach you, it's important that you make him feel like he can. ^{[1]
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2
Smile. Not only does smiling make you approachable, it also shows that you're a happy and fun person, both of which are traits guys love to see in a girl.

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3
Be confident in yourself. Confidence is so important because it means that YOU know your value; and a guy can never take that from you. So value who you are, and don't be afraid to be yourself.
4
Make eye contact. Direct eye contact is a great way to get a guy's attention, because they can't misread it. You want to connect with him, and you're not afraid to show it.
5
Start a conversation with him. Talking to a guy in person and getting to know him a little bit before asking for his number can make things a lot easier. You'll already be comfortable with him and you can get a sense for how he feels about you.
- Compliment him. Whether it's something he's wearing or his eyes, a compliment tells him you're taking notice in him.
- Let him do most of the talking. Ask him questions about himself. Pay attention and be genuinely interested.
- If he turns the conversation to you, try to avoid going into detail and then change the subject. You can also tell him you have to go (even if you don't). This makes you seem mysterious and leaves him wanting more (like learning those details you refused to share). It also eliminates the chances of the conversation ending awkwardly.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Going for It

1
Approach him with confidence. It's not cute to look at your feet and mutter “um” every few words.
- Keep your head up, your voice strong and stay calm. A quiet confidence is key. It adds to your mystery.
- Go in with no expectations. Confidence is knowing you're fine even if he says no. His loss! A "who cares?" attitude puts you in control.
2
Plan what you're going to say. Some girls may be able to wing it, but you're less likely to fumble or lose track of your thoughts if you have a general idea of what you'd like to say.
- You might try, “Hey Ryan! We should hang out outside of school sometime. Can I get your number?”
- If you want to look really confident, when you're having a conversation and it starts to wind down say, “This is usually the point when a guy asks for my number.” You may even get the added bonus of making him laugh!
3
Give him your number. This can be a really effective method of getting his number, but it's not guaranteed. It will go one of two ways:
- He immediately texts or calls you so you also have his number too. Score!
- He takes your number, and you're left waiting for him to contact you. This can actually be good for you, because if he doesn't contact you it's a sign to move on. You've then spared yourself the time and possible hurt feelings in the long run.
4
Write him a note. In person communication is always preferred; however, if he's either not in any of your classes or you really can't bring yourself to ask him in person, then writing him a note is a good alternative.
- Get straight to the point and write something like, “Hey Sam. We hardly ever get to talk between classes, so I wanted to give you my number so we can get in touch whenever.”

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Getting His Number the “Sneaky” Way

1
Use common cell phone issues to your advantage. The beautiful thing about technology making mistakes is that we can use this as a very believable excuse, even if it's not true.^{[2]
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- Try this common problem: “I lost/dropped my phone and lost all of my contacts. Text me your number so I have it?”
- For an excuse that works anywhere and anytime try, “I can't find my phone! Will you call it for me so I know I didn't lose it?”
- If you have an opportunity to catch a cool photo together, you can even say, “My phone is out of space, can I use yours and send it to myself?” This is also a good way to get his Instagram handle.
2
Use school as an excuse. School is the easiest and most believable excuse to get a boy's number if you have classes together.
- Ask him if he can help you with your homework sometime.
  - DO NOT pretend you're bad in a subject in the style of Cady Heron from Mean Girls, just to have an excuse to talk to a guy. If he's the one who could use some help say, “Maybe we could study together sometime.”
- If you're both working on a group project or other assignment, you can use this excuse to ask him for his number for a simple reason like, "so I can text you if I have a question."
3
Invite him to a group event, and make a quick exit. This is going to put him on the spot, while also showing your care-free and independent side.^{[3]
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- “A few of us are getting together this weekend to see a movie. Text me if you're interested. Gotta go!”
- This should prompt him to say, “Wait, I don't have your number!” If he doesn't think of that fast enough, he'll find a way to get your number. If he doesn't find a way, you're better off without him.

Warnings

He could possibly straight up say, “No.” If this is the case, he's not worth your time anyway. Don't let it get you down.

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Don't mess with a guy who is already going out with someone. This will cause major problems.

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Don't be too friendly instead of flirty, or he may think you want to be just friends.

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Be prepared for him not to feel the same way about you. If he wants to be just friends, then be happy with that. This could always change once he gets to know you better.

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