This article was co-authored by wikiHow staff writer, Amy Bobinger. Amy Bobinger has been a writer and editor at wikiHow since 2017. She especially enjoys writing articles that help people overcome interpersonal hurdles but frequently covers a variety of subjects, including health and wellness, spirituality, gardening, and more. Amy graduated with a B.A. in English Lit from Mississippi College in 2011 and now lives in her hometown with her husband and two young sons.
There are 14 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page.
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It can be hard sometimes to appreciate everything you have in life, especially when times get tough. However, it's possible to feel blessed no matter what you're going through. Instead of focusing on the negative, follow these tips to help you embrace the good that's all around you!
Steps
Living Your Best Life
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1Start the day with a smile. Every day, try to begin your morning with a positive attitude, even when it’s hard. Look in the mirror and smile, and remind yourself that it’s a new day where anything can happen. Being positive can help you reduce your stress, which can actually make you happier in the long run.[1]
- Try hanging up a positive affirmation where you’ll see it each morning, like beside the mirror where you brush your teeth or above your coffee pot. Take a few minutes to contemplate the message every day.
- Your affirmation should be something that is particular to you. For instance, if you struggle with self-doubt, you might want a reminder that says something like, “You can do it!” or “Try your best!”
- In addition to reducing your stress, being positive can even have positive health effects, like improved cardiovascular health and even improved resistance to colds!
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2Get involved in a hobby. Don’t let the argument “I’m too busy” keep you from trying something new–most people lose time every day to social media, emails, and other procrastination methods. However, you’ll feel more blessed if you spend your free time doing something you really enjoy. If you don’t already have a hobby, spend some time thinking about something you’ve always wanted to do, then figure out how to get involved![2]
- Find a hobby that fits your lifestyle. If you’re active, you might decide to take up a sport or other physical activity, like tennis, competitive dance, or coaching a Little League team.
- If you enjoy hanging out and binge-watching your favorite show on Netflix or Hulu, crafts like crocheting or painting might be more your speed.
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3Appreciate what you already have. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that having the latest electronics, coolest clothes, or biggest house will make you happy, but the drive to constantly own more possessions will only leave you frustrated. Instead, try to find value in what you do have. If you can be happy with that, you’ll feel blessed every day.[3]
- Instead of wishing for a bigger house, for instance, learn to love the place where you live. Hang up pictures of your family and friends, decorate in your favorite colors, and organize your things to make the most of the space you have.
- If you love fashion but you can’t afford a whole new wardrobe, mix and match your clothes into new outfits, and add in a special piece every now and then when you want to refresh your style.
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4Listen to music that makes you feel good. A great song can lift your mood and can make you feel more connected to the world around you. Make a playlist full of the songs that make you feel good, and listen to it whenever you get some free time. Try listening to your playlist when you’re driving, cleaning, or working for an instant mood boost.[4]
- Everybody’s taste in music is different. It doesn’t matter if you love pop, punk, trap music, or an obscure form of music made entirely with spoons. Just listen to what you love!
- If you’re not sure where to start, listen to music online with an Internet radio station like iHeartRadio, Spotify, or Pandora.
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5Forgive yourself when you make a mistake. Nobody’s perfect, and if you want to focus on being blessed, you’ll have to forgive yourself for past mistakes. Learn to see those mistakes as stepping stones on the path to becoming who you are today, and embrace the lessons you learned from those them.[5]
- Be honest with yourself about things you wish you hadn’t done. This will help you avoid making the same mistakes in the future.
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6Make time to relax every day. While it’s very important to work hard and push yourself to always do your best, it’s also vital to stop and take a break once in a while. No matter how busy you are, you should make it a priority to find time to relax. A faraway vacation is always nice, but even if you can’t do that, you can carve out a few minutes for yourself during the day to do something that’s just for you.[6]
- Think about what really makes you feel relaxed. Your break might be as simple as sitting on your back porch drinking your morning coffee or traveling to a nearby farmers’ market on the weekend to get some fresh veggies for the week.
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7Stop comparing yourself with other people. If you’re always looking at what other people have, it will be hard for you to ever feel fully satisfied. Someone will always have more money, better looks, or a nicer car than you. Instead of comparing yourself to them, look around at the things you do have and try to appreciate them.[7]
- Unfortunately, thanks to the rise of social media, it’s all too easy to see only the highlights of a person’s life. This can then lead you to feel dissatisfied with what you have. In reality, those people are only portraying what they want you to see, when their real life might be as messy and normal as yours.
- Whenever you catch yourself comparing yourself to someone else, replace the thought with something nice about yourself instead.
Building Positive Relationships
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1Surround yourself with positive, interesting people. Prioritize spending time with the people in your life who make you feel good. Reach out to your friends and family on a regular basis, and try to get together with them whenever you have the chance. Nurturing healthy relationships will be a constant reminder of how blessed you are.[8]
- Sometimes, especially if you’ve been going through a hard time, you might lose touch with people who are important to you. If you notice that happening, make an effort to repair the relationship by sending a call or text letting that person know how much they mean to you. Chances are, you’ll discover they’ve just been waiting to hear from you.
- If someone makes you feel bad anytime they’re around, it’s okay to back away from that relationship, even if they’re a relative.
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2Let others know what you need from them. Don't expect the people around you to guess what you need. They’re not mind readers, and asking them to intuitively understand what you want will just leave you feeling sad and unfulfilled. This, in turn, could even cause your family and friends to withdraw from you. Instead, clearly communicate your needs in a kind but specific way.[9]
- For instance, if you’re feeling sad and you need someone to talk to, try saying something like, “I had a really tough day. Can we grab a cup of coffee so I can vent about it?”
- If you need your partner or kids to help more around the house, you could say, “I know you’re really busy, but there’s a lot to do around the house. Do you mind pitching in for about half an hour so we can get things cleaned up?”
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3Accept people for who they are. Trying to change someone into your version of what you want them to be is about as productive as banging your head against a wall. When you choose to have someone in your life, you should accept them for exactly who they are, the good and the bad. After all, if you change something you don’t like about a person, you might end up changing something about them that you do like, too.[10]
- For instance, if you love that your partner is spontaneous, but you wish they were better at being on time, trying to make them more punctual might also stop them from unexpectedly bringing you flowers after work.
- If you feel like a person’s bad traits outweigh the good, you’re probably better off keeping that person at arm’s length.
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4Learn to accept compliments. Many people get into the habit of minimizing or even accepting compliments. For instance, if someone says, “You look really great today,” it can be tempting to say, “Oh thanks, but I didn’t really have much time to get ready.” Instead, graciously accept a compliment when you get one by saying, “Thank you,” and try to see yourself the way that person sees you.[11]
- You’ll also benefit by giving frequent and sincere compliments to the people around you.
Cultivating Gratitude
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1Say thank you to others. Practice showing gratitude every day, for big and small things. A simple “thank you” or “I appreciate that!” can go a long way for someone who’s done something nice for you, and they’ll be more inclined to help you in the future. In addition, when you express how grateful you are, it will be a constant reminder that you’re blessed.[12]
- Don’t underestimate the power of a thoughtful thank you note!
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2Keep a gratitude journal. Writing down what you’re grateful for is a very tangible way to “count your blessings.” Get a small journal, and make a rule that you have to spend a few minutes a day writing down something you’re grateful for. You could write just one thing each day, or you could set a goal to write 3-5 items each day. These could be material possessions that you are grateful to have, people who mean something to you, or even person traits you like about yourself.[13]
- When you feel discouraged, read through your gratitude journal to help lift your spirits and remind yourself how blessed you really are.
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3Volunteer in your free time. If you want to be more grateful for the things you have in your life, try spending time giving a helping hand to people who are less fortunate. In addition to forming powerful friendships, you’re likely to come away with a renewed appreciation for everything you have.[14]
- You could try to find an organization that allows you to construct houses for needy families, serve food at a soup kitchen, or spend time with children who really need a mentor.
- If you’re not sure where you’ll be most needed, try searching on a website that matches potential volunteers with opportunities in their area, like https://www.volunteermatch.org/ or https://www.createthegood.org/.
References
- ↑ https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/positive-thinking/art-20043950
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/happy-trails/201509/six-reasons-get-hobby
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/out-the-darkness/201203/the-madness-materialism
- ↑ https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/music-can-boost-memory-and-mood
- ↑ https://www.mindful.org/how-to-practice-forgiving-yourself/
- ↑ https://www.fastcompany.com/3034928/why-you-need-to-stop-thinking-you-are-too-busy-to-take-breaks
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/lisaquast/2015/08/03/stop-comparing-yourself-to-others-and-focus-on-you-heres-how/
- ↑ https://www.forbes.com/sites/johnhall/2016/03/20/10-simple-ways-to-improve-your-people-skills-and-build-relationships/#26b8db75d518
- ↑ https://psychcentral.com/news/2015/01/09/withdrawal-or-expecting-lover-to-read-your-mind-harms-relationship/79678.html
- ↑ https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/your-wise-brain/201410/accept-them-they-are
- ↑ https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/234668
- ↑ https://www.fastcompany.com/3039910/why-you-should-say-thank-you-more-often
- ↑ https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/tips_for_keeping_a_gratitude_journal
- ↑ https://wiredimpact.com/blog/websites-to-help-you-find-volunteer-opportunities/