How to Calm Your Nerves at the Dentist

Co-authored by Alina Lane, DDS and Hunter Rising

Last Updated: February 1, 2022 References

We know that visiting the dentist can be a little nerve-wracking, even if you’re just going in for a regular check-up. Your dentist will do everything they can to help you relax, but it’s completely normal to still feel a little anxious about it. Luckily, there are a lot of ways to help control your anxiety whenever you're at your dentist’s office. We’ll go over tips about arriving at your appointment and move on to some suggestions on how to relieve your nervousness during your procedure.

1

Schedule morning appointments.

Visit your dentist early so you don’t worry about it all day. Rather than making your appointment later in the afternoon, see if there are any openings right away in the morning. Choose the earliest time as possible so you’re able to get your appointment out of the way and can focus on the rest of the day.^{[1]
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- If you normally have to work in the morning, see if your dentist’s office schedules appointments on weekends.

2

Get to your appointment right on time.

Sitting in the waiting room might make you more anxious. Avoid arriving really early for your appointment since you might stress out waiting for the dentist to call you to their office. Instead, leave at the latest possible time. If you still get to your dentist early, try waiting outside or in your vehicle until it’s closer to your scheduled appointment time so you’re not in a higher-stress environment.^{[2]
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Harvard Medical School
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- Make sure you give yourself enough time to get to your appointment without being late since that might make you more stressed out.

3

Bring a friend or family member.

Someone you trust can help comfort you during your visit. Let your loved one know that you get really nervous when you go to the dentist's office and ask if they’re available to come to your appointment. When you’re at the appointment, have a casual and relaxing conversation, hold their hand, or ask them to comfort you. That way, you don’t have to go through everything on your own.^{[3]
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Harvard Medical School
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- If your loved one can’t come with you, ask your dentist if you’re able to call them during your appointment so you can still hear their voice.

4

Let your dentist know you’re anxious.

Your dentist wants to make you feel comfortable and safe. Right when you get to your appointment, let the receptionist and your dentist know that you’re a little bit nervous or afraid of the pain. Let them know if you’ve had bad experiences with other dentists and ask them questions about your procedure. They may have some suggestions or strategies to calm you down.^{[4]
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Expert Source

Alina Lane, DDS
Board Certified Dentist
Expert Interview. 21 April 2020.}
- If you haven’t seen your dentist before, stop by their office before your scheduled appointment to meet them and talk about what you’re afraid of. By the time your appointment arrives, they’ll be able to adapt to your specific needs.
- The dental staff will usually do everything they can to make you feel relaxed during your visit. If your dentist isn’t accommodating to your needs, then it may be time to find a new one. Look for someone who specializes or works with patients that have anxiety since they’ll be able to work around the things that make you nervous.

5

Ask the dentist to explain what they’re doing.

You won’t feel as nervous if you know exactly what’s happening. Talk to your dentist and ask questions about exactly what they’re going to do during your appointment. Ask them to tell you about the procedure first so you can get a better understanding of it. If they have the time, see if they can demonstrate each step before actually working on your teeth. Seeing and hearing the steps takes a lot of the unknown stress off of you and builds trust between you and your dentist.^{[6]
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- Ask questions about how painful your procedure will be. Typically, routine cleanings are relatively painless so you shouldn’t worry about them as much.
- During the procedure, ask them to say what they’re doing out loud so you can mentally prepare for it in the moment.

6

See if light sedation is an option.

Sedation helps you relax and makes your procedure pain-free. Ask your dentist if they offer nitrous oxide, or “laughing gas,” to help you calm down. They’ll fit a mask over your face and give you enough gas so you’re still able to respond to them. You may not remember everything that happens during the appointment, but you’ll feel relaxed and less anxious.^{[7]
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- You’ll usually need someone else to take you to your appointment since sedation affects your ability to drive.
- If you have serious anxiety or are undergoing a larger procedure, you may be given a full anesthetic and be put to sleep while your dentist works. You won’t feel pain during the procedure if you’re fully put under.^{[8]
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  American Dental Association
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7

Agree on hand signals for when you’re stressed.

Signals are a great way to let your dentist know you need a break. Before your dentist starts working in your mouth, talk to them and agree on a signal, such as raising your hand or tapping on the chair 3 times. During your procedure, if you ever feel too nervous, stressed, or are in pain, give your dentist the signal so they stop working. Explain to them what’s making you anxious and take a few seconds to calm down again.^{[9]
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8

Try deep breathing exercises.

Deep, slow breaths help you calm down in the moment. You can try this in the waiting room or while you’re sitting in the dentist’s chair to feel more relaxed.^{[10]
X
Trustworthy Source
Harvard Medical School
Harvard Medical School's Educational Site for the Public
Go to source} Sit up straight and blow out all the air you have in your lungs until they feel like they’re empty. Count while you take a long, slow breath in so your lungs are full. Then count as you breathe out. Keep breathing until you aren’t feeling as nervous.^{[11]
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Trustworthy Source
PubMed Central
Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health
Go to source}
- You can also try following a short guided meditation to slow your breathing and ease your mind.
- Pair your breathing exercises with progressive muscle relaxation to get rid of physical tension.

9

Imagine you’re in a relaxing place.

Pretending to be in your happy place keeps you distracted. Close your eyes and try to visualize the most calming place you can think of. Maybe it’s sitting in front of a cozy fire, lying on a quiet beach, or walking through a garden. Think about how stress-free and relaxed you’d feel if you were actually there so you feel less tense at the dentist’s office.^{[12]
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10

Listen to some soothing music.

Drown out the sound of drills with your favorite tunes. Bring a pair of headphones with you and make a playlist of some music that helps you relax. Let your dentist explain the procedure to you before turning on your music. Close your eyes and turn the volume up enough so you can’t hear your dentist’s tools while they’re working.^{[13]
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Trustworthy Source
Harvard Medical School
Harvard Medical School's Educational Site for the Public
Go to source}
- If you forgot your headphones, ask your dentist if they have any at the office you can use.
- Be careful not to bob your head or sing along to your music since it might disturb the work your dentist is doing.
- Come up with a signal your dentist can use to get your attention while they’re working. For example, you can ask them to tap on your shoulder when you need to stop your music and listen to their instructions.

11

Watch your favorite TV show.

Ask for the remote if your dentist has a TV in their office. Some dentists put TVs on the ceiling so you can watch something during your procedure. Ask them to change it to your favorite channel or channel surf until you find something you like. During your appointment, focus all your attention on the TV so you aren’t as concerned with what your dentist is doing in your mouth.^{[14]
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Harvard Medical School
Harvard Medical School's Educational Site for the Public
Go to source}
- If they don’t have a TV, ask your dentist if you can watch something on your phone or a tablet.

12

Squeeze on a stress-relief ball.

Use this to release some of your tension during your procedure. Keep a stress ball in one of your hands during the entire appointment. Whenever you feel nervous, give the stress ball a few tight squeezes instead of clenching your jaw or tensing up your muscles. Take deep, slow breaths while you use your stress ball so you stay calm and relaxed.^{[15]
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Trustworthy Source
Harvard Medical School
Harvard Medical School's Educational Site for the Public
Go to source}
- You can bring your own stress ball, but your dentist may have one at their office if you ask them.

13

Get anti-anxiety medication for future procedures.

Ask your dentist about a prescription if you have severe anxiety. Talk to your dentist before you have any oral surgery if you’re feeling really anxious about the procedure. They may prescribe you a single-dose anti-anxiety medication, such as diazepam or lorazepam, that you can take on the day of your surgery to feel more relaxed.^{[16]
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Trustworthy Source
PubMed Central
Journal archive from the U.S. National Institutes of Health
Go to source}^{[17]
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Expert Source

Alina Lane, DDS
Board Certified Dentist
Expert Interview. 21 April 2020.} Take the medication an hour before your appointment, or whenever your dentist recommends, so you don’t feel as nervous during your procedure.^{[18]
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- The size of your dose depends on the length of your appointment. For a 1–2 hour appointment, you’ll usually get 0.125–0.5 mg of medication. For one that’s 2–4 hours long, you may get 1–4 mg instead.
- You will need someone to take and pick you up from your appointment since you cannot safely drive after medication.

Expert Q&A

Question

How can I feel less anxious for my first appointment with a new dentist?

Alina Lane, DDS
Board Certified Dentist
Dr. Alina Lane is a Dentist who runs All Smiles Dentistry, a general practice dental office based in New York City. After completing a DDS at the University of Maryland, Dr. Lane completed a year-long clerkship in Implantology at the University of Maryland, where she focused on the advanced restoration of dental implants. She continued her advanced education by completing a General Practice Residency at Woodhull Medical Center, an affiliate of the NYU School of Medicine. She received the Woodhull Medical Center Resident of the Year 2012-2013.

Alina Lane, DDS

Board Certified Dentist

Expert Answer

If you suffer from fear of going to the dentist, it may help to keep your first visit as short and sweet as possible. A first visit generally consists of a dentist performing an exam to evaluate your oral health, x-rays, and a cleaning. If you suffer from sensitive teeth or gums, you will want to inform your dentist or hygienist so they can be considerate of your sensitivity and minimize any discomfort. Topical or local anesthesia may also be used to help numb your mouth during treatments, so you are more comfortable during treatment. If you suffer from extreme anxiety, you may want your doctor to prescribe an anti-anxiety medication that you take the night before or day of the appointment.