How to Be a Casanova

Co-authored by Hardy Jean

Last Updated: October 4, 2022 References Approved

A “Casanova” is a suave man who tries to seduce as many women as possible. The real Casanova, Italian playboy Giacomo Casanova, famously bedded over 120 women throughout his life. However, there’s more to being a Casanova than that. Being charismatic, charming, confident, and attentive are all a part of the classic Casanova lifestyle.

Method 1

Method 1 of 4:

Building an Irresistible Personality

1
Work on your self-confidence. Confidence is a very attractive quality, and it's something Casanova used to impress the people around him. If you don't feel like a confident person, then work on building your self-esteem and image. That way, you can interact with people easily, especially women, and draw them in.^{[1]
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- A big part of confidence is the way you talk to yourself. Try to eliminate negative thinking from your mind, and focus on positive thoughts to improve your self-image.
- Confidence stems from competence, and the best way to build competence is to engage in something that is a rigorous activity for you to do at first. Try to engage in some type of physical activity or hobby. As you become more proficient at it, you'll learn to be more confident in yourself and it will impact your dating life as well.
- Don't overdo it, though. Trying to oversell your confidence could make you look selfish or like a show-off. You don't want that, and it could turn people away.
- Women love men who can confidently talk about their achievements without coming off as being cocky. A big part of that is really just having a proper reference point for your competence, rather than just talking about how great you are. Do your best to talk about the impact that your experiences had on you. That way, you'll give them a little more insight into who you are and what values really resonate the most with you.
2
Try to charm everyone around you. Work the room! Casanova was the life of the party, and he did this by winning others over with his personality.^{[2]
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Research source} Introduce yourself to people, have small talk, learn their names, and give compliments when you can. This charms everyone and gets them on your side.
- Remember not to only focus your charm on women you're trying to meet. Charming everyone is part of being a Casanova.
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3
Have great conversations with everyone you meet. Casanova loved conversation, so follow his lead and work on your own conversation skills. Tell stories and always have something to say to keep the conversation going. But don't just make it a one-sided conversation; ask questions too! Get people to talk about themselves so they loosen up. This is another great way to charm the people around you.^{[3]
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- Listening is also part of having great conversations. Take a genuine interest in what people are saying and ask them more questions. This is a good way to show people that you're interested and get them to feel more comfortable.
4
Accept failures in stride. No matter how hard you try, you'll fail sometimes. This is okay! Accepting those failures and moving on is a key part of having a strong personality. People will be impressed with the way you let failures roll right off your back.^{[4]
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- This is especially important with dating. Some women will reject you, and that's their right. Accept it and move on. Casanova wouldn't let it get him down.

Method 2

Method 2 of 4:

Becoming More Worldly

1
Educate yourself on literature and science to learn a variety of topics. Casanova has a reputation as just a man who slept with a lot of women, but there was much more to him than that. He was well-educated in literature, philosophy, science, and music, which was a big part of his charm. Educating yourself is a great way to copy him.^{[5]
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Research source} That way, you'll always have something interesting to say in conversations.
- Work on inserting anecdotes from literature or science into your normal conversation. This will make you look enlightened and well-read.
- Casanova was especially fond of poetry, and would often meet with famous poets of his day. Read some classic poetry like Homer’s Odyssey and Iliad or the works of Shakespeare.
2
Seek out new experiences to broaden your horizons. Be a spontaneous person and never shy away from new experiences. This makes you a fun person to be around and gives you tons of stories to entertain people with. Breaking out of your own shell and trying new things will make you a more well-rounded person.^{[6]
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- You don’t have to do crazy things to have new experiences. It can be as simple as trying a new cuisine that you’ve never had before or going to a park in your hometown you’ve never visited.
- Being spontaneous and exciting was also a way that Casanova impressed women, so it can help you in your dating life as well.
- Remember that Casanova’s spontaneity sometimes got him in trouble. Always be careful and don’t break the law while you’re seeking out new experiences.
3
Travel to learn about the world. Traveling gives you insight into different people and cultures. Not only will this improve your own life, but you’ll look more sophisticated to other people as well.^{[7]
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- Explore when you visit new places too. Take in the local sites, foods, and people to learn as much as you can.
- You don’t have to spend a ton of money to travel. A simple road trip for a weekend is a great way to expand your horizons without being extravagant.
- If you can’t travel, then you can still learn about the world. Try reading about different cultures or watching documentaries to educate yourself.
4
Treat yourself to fine food and clothes. Don't deny yourself any pleasures. Follow Casanova's lead by seeking out fine food and wearing fancy clothing. This shows people that you appreciate the finer things in life.^{[8]
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- These are also good ways to get attention on dates. Taking your date to an exotic restaurant is a good way to show that you’re a worldly person.
- Casanova often had rich patrons who paid for his lifestyle. Since you probably don’t, be careful to watch your budget.

Method 3

Method 3 of 4:

Talking to Women

1
Respect women and their opinions. Casanova wasn’t just about getting women in bed. He viewed women as equals and always wanted to hear what they had to say. Make an effort to show respect and interest in the women you’re speaking to. View them as equals and take their opinions seriously to follow in Casanova’s footsteps.^{[9]
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- Follow this advice even if you’re not romantically interested in a woman. Everyone deserves your respect and understanding.
- This carries over to men as well if that’s who you’re attracted to. Always view potential dates as interesting people who you could learn something from.
2
Ask women genuine questions about themselves. Listening is a key part of a good conversation. Whenever Casanova spoke to a woman, he tended to listen more than he talked and took a genuine interest in her answers. Following this advice is a great way to connect with people. Ask genuine questions during your conversations and listen attentively to the answers. This helps people feel more comfortable around you.^{[10]
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- You don’t necessarily have to be romantically interested in a woman to ask questions about herself, but Casanova considered the practice a part of seduction. Keep this in mind if you’re on a date.
- Don’t try to fake interest while you’re talking to someone. This doesn’t build any connection, and your partner will probably realize at some point that you’re not really interested.
3
Keep in touch with women after meeting them. Don't just break contact with women after meeting them. If you meet someone and enjoyed talking with them, then stay in contact. Call, message, or text once in a while to talk and maintain the connection. Even if you aren’t romantically involved, this is a great way to make lifelong friends.^{[11]
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- Don’t harass anyone, however. If they don’t want to keep talking to you, then respect that.

Method 4

Method 4 of 4:

Seducing Your Dates

1
Take charge by planning out dates. A well-planned date was key to Casanova’s seduction technique. Instead of simply asking your date what they want to do, be active and plan the date out. That way, your date sees that you made the effort to plan and prepare to impress her.^{[12]
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- If you’re trying to think of date ideas, here is an opportunity to show that you were listening when your partner was talking. If she mentioned that she likes something in particular, like mini golf, make that your next date.
- Don’t do this if your date says she doesn’t like when men do this. What she wants comes first.
2
Focus all your attention on your date. Women love being the center of attention, so focus all of yours on your date. Listen to her, compliment her, make eye contact, and overall do what you can to let her know that you're completely focused on the date.^{[13]
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- Keeping your phone away is important too. Don't make your date feel like you're distracted.
- Definitely don't be staring at any other women on your date. This is a good way to get rejected.
3
Surprise your date with gifts. A nice gift is key to a great date. Present your date with flowers, chocolates, or other little gifts to make them feel special. This was a big part of Casanova’s routine, and it should be part of yours too.^{[14]
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- Try to give gifts that you know your date will like. If she says she loves orchids, for example, a bouquet of these flowers is a great choice.
- Casanova tended to be lavish with his gifts, but keep your budget in mind and don’t overdo it.^{[15]
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  Research source} You don’t have to give your date fine clothes or jewels to make her happy!
4
Set a romantic mood. If you’re trying to get your date interested in your, then atmosphere is key. Dim the lights, light candles, or put on some soft music to set the mood. This helps your date get more comfortable with you and builds intimacy.^{[16]
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- Casanova liked to serve seductive foods on dates like oysters and champagne. You could follow his lead with dishes like these.
5
Take your time to build the attraction. Don’t rush things. Enjoy the conversation, the food, the atmosphere, and all the other parts of your date. The best way to build connection and attraction with your potential partner is by showing them a great time, so stay in the moment and enjoy each other’s company before trying to end the date or get them to come home with you.^{[17]
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- Ask plenty of questions during the date to keep your partner talking. Listen attentively so your date knows that you’re interested.
- Remember that Casanova genuinely enjoyed company and conversation. He wouldn’t have just wanted to end the date and get his date in bed as quickly as possible.
6
Make sure you won’t be disturbed if you take your date home. If your date does decide to come home with you, then privacy is key. Make sure you two can enjoy each other’s company without being disturbed.^{[18]
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Research source} If you have any roommates or guests, warn them ahead of time so they won’t bother you. That way, you and your date can focus on each other.
- A good way to set a private, romantic mood is cooking your date dinner at your home. This way, you can take your time, relax, set the mood, and avoid distractions.
- You could also get a hotel room if your home isn’t as private as you’d like it to be.

Warnings

Always get consent from your date before doing anything sexual and stop immediately if they tell you to.

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Casanova did many things that we would consider morally wrong or even illegal today, like pursuing underage women. This was common in Casanova’s time, so it wasn’t considered a problem. However, always follow modern laws and ethics when you’re looking for partners.

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Practice safe sex by wearing a condom.

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