How to Write a Captivating Online Dating Profile (Introverts)

Select a photo with someone significantly less attractive than yourself would create the perfect perceptual contrast of increasing your appeal. But for the more ethical:

1. Current photos are ideal. Many people use old photos of their former and more attractive selves. It’s an ingenious idea at the beginning… until you have to meet the person you’re talking with, and have to reassure them that they didn’t sleep in and arrive 20 years late for your date…
2. More than one photo allows for people to get a more three dimensional idea of what you look like in different contexts. Preferably include at least one head shot and one full body shot.
3. Be original and grab people's attention to receive higher responses. This could be perfect if you’re a bit shy and don’t want to show a picture of yourself. For example, you could put one picture up of you wearing a costume, or one where you draw a smiley face on a piece of paper and cover your face with it. These kinds of pictures will add a touch of quirky playfulness, while adding a sense of mystery so that people want more.
4. Details in picking the image will make all the difference. If you’re aiming at attracting geeks or nerds then photos with your glasses on or playing your favorite video games will work wonders. If you’d like an adventurer like yourself, a photo of yourself rock climbing is perfect. Also keep in mind the small things like lighting in the photo, clothes you’re wearing and even the size of your pupils. A psychology study analyzing pupil sizes discovered that we find large pupils more inviting and attractive, just as I mentioned in another article.

Write Your ‘About Me’

• Show people your personality, don’t describe it. How often have you seen the same repetitive: “I love to have fun and be spontaneous!!!“, as opposed to what? Not liking to have fun? And saying you’re spontaneous makes it sound planned. Listing sports, movies, music and travel as your interests is uninteresting, most people like a certain sport, movie, song or place to go to. Also, generalizing your tastes by saying for instance “I like all kinds of music” is just a falsified cover-up to make yourself appear that you’re cultured, when in fact you’re actually dispassionate and boring. Writing: “I like to visit India because it’s such an ancient culture rich with variety, spirituality, acceptance and color” would be much more revealing of who you are. Here are some helpful hints:

Fill out as many of the basic details as you can, the more specific the information is, the more options people will have of narrowing you down using the search filters: Wants Kids, Aries and so on.

• The opening lines are pivotal for the success of your self bio. Just like in many writing formats, how you open your paragraphs will either hook your reader in and entice them to read further or will dull them away. It will be difficult, but craft the first sentence very carefully.

Don't make it too long or too short. The length should preferably be around 300 words. The internet generation is one of impatience, nobody likes reading 3-mouse-scroll-downs lengths of text. Too little text however and you’ll come across as empty, lazy, lifeless and boring. Too much and you’re obsessive, psycho and neurotic.

Check your spelling and have someone else check your spelling. Spelling is one of the pet-peeves of many. Spelling words correctly makes your writing flow a lot more smoothly, as does using punctuation and new paragraphs. If your reader unconsciously feels the tension of having to decipher your spelling mistakes, then that anxiety will also influence their perception of you. Furthermore, your choice of words can change the meaning of what you want to convey entirely. “I don’t want to die alone” is a common fear. “I want someone to die with” is a suicide pact.

Show why it is that you posses the qualities that you value. If you consider yourself caring, instead of writing that, why not share that you enjoy cooking for your parents or coaching your nephews soccer team?

Mention your aspirations and passions throughout your profile. For instance: what it is you aspire to do in life, what hobbies bring you the greatest joy, what qualities you value in others. The more important things you reveal about yourself, whether favorite movie or favorite ice cream flavor, the more chances someone will read your profile and think: “wow, this person sounds so much like me“.

Avoid negative phrasing, it makes you appear close-minded, cold and superficial. Instead of stating: “No old creepy men”, “I’d like someone around my age to be able to grow old with” sounds much more warm and positive. Instead of “No non-christians”, “My religion plays a huge role in my life” is much more welcoming.