How to Not Take Yourself Too Seriously

Last Updated: February 26, 2023 References

Sometimes it can be hard to laugh at yourself and not take life so seriously. There's stress, relationship problems, and the demands of family and work that often make it hard to look for levity in life's situations. Taking yourself less seriously is a sign of comfort and helps you grow as a person. While you can't always control what happens, you can control how you react. Choosing to not take yourself so seriously is a positive step to help deal with negative situations you can't always control.

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Keeping a Sense of Humor About Yourself

1
Laugh at yourself often. Life is going to throw a lot of curves your way and finding humor in less than ideal situations can be very useful. Put things in perspective. If you have a flat tire or a bad public speaking moment, take a step back and realize it's not the end of the world. ^{[1]
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- If someone says something hurtful to you, be the first to laugh at yourself. It shows you understand you may have flaws and aren't afraid if others recognize that.
2
Look for the positive in negative situations. One way to prevent taking yourself too seriously is to stop dwelling too heavily on the negative. If you're having a less than ideal day, try to find something positive thing about that situation.^{[2]
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- For example, if you get a flat tire, be glad it didn't happen on a highway or lead to an accident. Tires always need replaced eventually. This just expedited the process.
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3
Learn to joke about your sensitive areas. Rather than being worried about hiding things you are sensitive to, embrace them and laugh at them. If you are sensitive about your weight, make a joke about it and get everyone to laugh at it with you. This will loosen you up, but also make you less apt to worry about others and what they think about your sensitivities. ^{[3]
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- Start slow and in appropriate situations. Do it around people you like and trust and who you feel comfortable being vulnerable with.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Learning to Care Less about Others' Opinions

1
Know what's important to you. Learning your own values, and what's important to you, can make what others think of you far less important. When you know your priorities and feel comfortable with who you are, you'll be less apt to care what others think.
- Make a list of attributes that you like about yourself as well as values you aren't willing to compromise. This can give you certainty when others are pressuring you to change something about yourself and worry less that people are judging you.
2
Think about the worst-case scenario. Many times when we are worried about what others think of us, it prevents us from trying new things, or even old things, we enjoy. If you find yourself unwilling to try something new because you are afraid you'll look silly and be judged, picture the worst-case scenario. You'll see that the worst-case scenario is usually not that bad.^{[4]
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3
Limit your need for reassurance. Don't ask people to weigh in on you and your ideas, especially people who tend to be overly critical. Choose a select few people that you trust and know aren't overly negative for feedback and forget the rest.^{[5]
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- When you do seek reassurance, try asking a different question. Rather than asking "What do you think?" ask "How can I make this better?"
4
Remove sources of negativity. If you have co-workers, friends, or even family who are constantly weighing in on what you do negatively, this can make you more prone to care about others' opinions. Instead of reeling over negative things people say, try to remove the perpetuators of negativity altogether.^{[6]
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- If that's not possible because you see them constantly, then try to block out what they say by reminding yourself of your values and worth, regardless of what others think.
5
Stop trying to please everyone. Part of taking yourself too seriously has to do with being worried how others perceive you. Realize that some people may not like you, and that's okay. Keep being who you are, and enjoying it.^{[7]
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Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Accepting Your Flaws

1
Accept that you're only human. This means both that you will make mistakes and that you will learn from them, as long as you allow yourself. Life isn't a perfection contest and treating it as such can severely hamper your enjoyment of living.
2
Don't be afraid to look silly. People spend far less time watching what we do than we think. Being willing to step outside your comfort zone, whether its learning a new skill or breaking out a move on the dance floor, can help you grow as a person. Recognize your flaws and realize everyone has them; they make you unique.
3
Be open to new perspectives and advice. Oftentimes when people take themselves too seriously, every matter becomes personal. Take solace in the fact you don't know everything and the learning opportunities this presents.
- Whether you're arguing about a sports team, or your favorite movie, make room for other perspectives. Spending less time worrying about whether you sound right, and more time learning, can really help you grow as a person.
- Try listening more and speaking less. It's important to have your own opinions and express your thoughts on things, but sometimes we worry more about being heard and right and are unable to embrace that we may not know it all.
4
Learn what you can change and accept what you can't. It's important to distinguish between what you can change and can't. This will give you confidence that you're doing what you can. If you are sensitive about something you can change, like maybe your knowledge about a particular subject, take steps to improve.^{[8]
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- When you realize you can't change something, learn to embrace it. It's part of who you are and you'll spend less time worrying about something you can't help.