This article was co-authored by Kirsten Parker, MFA. Kirsten Parker is a Mindset and Action Coach based in her hometown of Los Angeles, California. She helps high achievers overcome stress and self-doubt. She specializes in increasing one's confidence and clarity by incorporating tools from positive psychology, mindful habit change, and self-regulation into her coaching. She is a Certified HeartMath Practitioner trained in Stress, Anxiety, and Intelligent Energy Management along with Emotional Intelligence and the Science of Self-Acceptance. She also holds an MFA from Yale University School of Drama in Stage Management.
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While “posh” typically implies that you’re rich, aristocratic, and wealthy, there’s also an air of class and elegance to it. Appearing to be posh can gain you respect, friends, and even a higher social status, so it’s understandable that you’d want to make everyone think you’re posh. If you want to make your goal come to fruition, we’ll show you how to turn your posh factor up!
Steps
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1Speak correctly. Listen to how people speak in your area and see if you can detect a “posh accent.” If so, try to imitate it. Avoid contractions – for example, say "you will" instead of “you'll.” Use elongated vowel sounds, and avoid swearing; it shows a lack of manners and wrong conduct.
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2Observe proper and correct posture. This is a very elegant, classy, and rare trait which is a valuable tool in becoming posh. You can work on your posture by taking drama classes, or walking around with a book on your head – it does work!Advertisement
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3Be knowledgeable. It is useful to become politically, culturally, and religiously aware – even the most basic knowledge can save a person from embarrassment and awkwardness. If you know in advance that you will be spending time with someone of an unfamiliar background, it is a good idea to do more in-depth research to avoid embarrassing faux pas.
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4Define yourself with a clean and elegant look. Excellent presentation is half of the battle! If you’re a girl, never wear anything you feel uncomfortable in, even if it’s fashionable – it is important to remember that modesty is vital in earning the respect of others. Stick to nice colors. Don’t pick something violent or that stands out – look for anything light, clean, and fresh looking. However, remember that what matters most is how you carry yourself – brands and fashions are only the frosting.
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5Good hygiene is crucial! You cannot be posh if you are dirty and smelly: shower daily, brush your teeth regularly, and keep your nails groomed and clean. If you’re a girl, find a light but fresh scent and stick to it, and keep your hair clean with plenty of volume.
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6Know your etiquette. This is very important! Posh people have good manners and know the boundaries in human relations. They know not to tread on toes but equally they know how to upbraid people who do. Manners are a form of currency for the posh person and the more you know of them, the better.
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7Eat politely. Don't stuff your face with food – chew your food, don't make any noises or gulp it down, and don’t take huge bites. Avoid eating anything that could get messy or sticky. Don't slouch when you're sitting in a chair – press your back against it and press your feet against the floor, and avoid folding your arms; it can make you look unsure about who you are and where you stand.
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8Do not insult, gossip, or slander. When necessary, voice your opinions appropriately and constructively. This encourages your audience to listen carefully when you speak. But if someone is bullying you, you have the right to insult. Always be nice to other people, unless you have something against them.
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9Be careful not to become materialistic. Posh people are not materialistic - that easily becomes garish and common. Rather, posh people seek out quality and style whatever it may be - a handbag, a house, a car. Buy the best that your money can afford and go without the trinkets. Try not to buy badly faked designer items, for example, do not buy a trashy bag with a huge metal G on, or a metal tag that has been stuck on askew, as it will be obvious that it is fake, and will identify you as poor, a chav or a wannabe.
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10Try to achieve and maintain a good physique. Begin playing sports. Sports like hockey, lacrosse, golf and tennis are great; but always find the right type of exercise for you instead of joining the latest trend. Never over-eat or over-indulge. Posh people know their limits and respect them; especially since respect in the eyes of others is very important for a posh person.
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11Concentrate in school. Stay intelligent and keen in school, and try hard in every subject you take. Always hand in homework, and don’t talk or pass notes in class. Ask questions and participate in class discussions. Help others if they're struggling, and don't suck up to your teachers. Just try hard, be punctual in everything and share your knowledge.
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12Make sure your belongings are neat. Label your things and look after them to make sure they don't get lost or damaged, and try covering your text and school books in clear contact paper to make them look neater. Buy some nice pencils and pens, and make sure you always have enough of everything – constantly asking to borrow things isn't very posh. Go for light and neutral colors and items that are good quality. Don't buy anything in dark colors like navy blue or black.
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13Always be friendly and generous. Having a selfish and nasty attitude towards others is never posh! Always have a smile on your face, and be willing to let people borrow things from you. Be nice to everyone, and never label people as “losers.” Everyone deserves a chance, so make sure you give it to them. Don't exclude people from games, gifts, or secrets, keep your promises and don't gossip. When someone gossips about someone else, politely tell them you find gossiping rather mean and would prefer not to. Never be impulsive or hot-headed – always keep your cool.
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14Be yourself! If you just aren’t a posh person, don’t try to pretend you are – you’ll make more friends and be happier if you stick with who you are. Don’t let people convince you to be posh (or not posh) if you really are.
- Don’t prioritize other people’s opinions of you while devaluing your own. Other people’s respect won’t satisfy you if you don’t respect yourself.
- Stay true to your values and priorities. The more genuinely you respect yourself, the more naturally you’ll attract respect from others!
Expert Q&A
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QuestionWhat other clothing or accessories would you recommend for someone who is trying to look posh?Jordan StolchJordan Stolch is an Image Strategist, Style Advisor, and the Founder of MiKADO - a concierge personal styling firm. With over a decade of experience, Jordan specializes in helping people eliminate the confusion and insecurities associated with how to dress in order to build a powerful image and use clothing to their strategic advantage. Jordan trains entrepreneurs, business leaders, and corporate executives in the foundations of "power dressing", from some of the country's preeminent companies such as Morgan Stanley, Deloitte, Berkshire Hathaway, Universal Music Group, Starbucks, and Disney. She works with clients both in-person and virtually, teaching them how to take the confusion out of style so they can operate at a higher level. Jordan earned her BA in Psychology from the University of Waterloo and studied Merchandise Marketing at the Fashion Institute of Technology (FIDM).
Image Consultant & Style AdvisorI would focus on statement handbags for starters. For example, something that has a structure to it, like a larger rectangle. For other accessories, I would go for a neck scarf. That could be either a smaller bandana style that you roll up and tie tightly around your neck or a bit bigger and then wrapped around your neck like a regular scarf. Another posh accessory could be a belt. A leather belt really pulls the entire look together. Then pay attention to jewelry. It could be statement gold earrings or something longer that is a bit more detail-oriented or elegant. Posh in my mind is really about the details and keeping it classy and elegant. -
QuestionHow do I gain weight when I'm too skinny?Community AnswerMake sure you are eating lots of proteins and healthy fats; nut butters, avocados, and Greek whole milk yogurt are great options. You can also look into high calorie protein shakes.
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QuestionCan you tell me what "upbraid" means?Community AnswerTo upbraid someone means to criticize them harshly.
Warnings
- Some people may dislike you or call you stuck-up or nerdy. If you know you've done nothing wrong or nasty, simply ignore them. They're trying to bring you down, so don't let them.⧼thumbs_response⧽
- Stay posh, but don’t become snobby or full of yourself.⧼thumbs_response⧽
- Avoid anything too flashy, trashy or revealing.⧼thumbs_response⧽
- Don't do anything to get you in trouble! Detention is never posh – always think of the consequences before you break rules.⧼thumbs_response⧽