How to Know if You're Too Old for Something

Co-authored by Leslie Bosch, PhD and Amy Bobinger

Last Updated: June 6, 2022 References

It can be hard to know sometimes if you're too old to do something, whether it's getting a bold new hairstyle or starting a new career. Luckily, you can look to society's unspoken rules to get a basic guideline for what you should do. However, the most important thing is to follow your own heart and do what makes you happy!

Method 1

Method 1 of 2:

Deciding What's Right for You

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Check to see what other people your age are doing. From an early age, people learn what is acceptable by looking to their peers. One way that you can tell if you're too old for something is to examine whether other people your age are doing it. If they aren't, you might want to give a little thought to why you still want to participate.
- For example, if a lot of your friends have stopped going out and partying every night, it might be a good idea to stay in on a work night a little more often.
- However, you shouldn't be afraid to be a trailblazer. Just because you don't know anyone else who's going back to school, for instance, doesn't mean that you shouldn't pursue your education, no matter how old you are.
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Take into consideration the reasoning behind a rule. When you're trying to decide if you're too old for something, think about why others might think there's an age limit. In some cases, you might find the argument valid enough to change your mind.^{[1]
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- Some guidelines, like the risks involved in having a baby after a certain age, are rooted in science, and are hard to deny. However, someone's opinion that you should have children soon because "you're running out of time" should have no bearing on your decision about when to start a family. Consider the source when you're thinking about the reasoning behind a rule.
- Similarly, a law that says you must take a vision test each year in order to maintain a driver's license exists because people's eyesight fades as they get older, so you have to comply with that. However, if you can see perfectly well and you still have an excellent reaction time, you shouldn't let anyone tell you that you're too old to drive.
- Other rules, such as being too old to get a nose ring or play with dolls, are more of an unspoken social guideline, and it's not as important to follow them.
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Follow rules that are in place for safety reasons. Sometimes, unspoken social rules are in place to protect you. If that's the case, it might not be worth the risk to try that particular activity. Instead, look for another outlet that will give you a similar feeling while minimizing your risks.^{[2]
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- For instance, there's a reason that some high-octane activities, like skateboarding or parkouring, are usually performed by young people. That's because as you get older, it's harder to recover from an injury or a fall, so unless you're in really great shape, you're taking an extra risk by participating in an activity like this. Instead, you might try cycling or swimming to get an adrenaline rush without as much danger.^{[3]
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- Other safety-related rules might include avoiding activities that are meant for children once you're fully grown, like riding on a small plastic toy or jumping in a bounce house.
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Be realistic about your situation. No matter how young you might feel, eventually you will probably have to face the reality that you aren't as young as you used to be. When you're making a decision, you should be realistic about what you can and can't do, and consider your health in the future as part of your plans.^{[4]
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- For instance, if you're in your 40s and you're thinking about starting a family, you'll face different challenges than if you were in your 20s or 30s. This doesn't mean you shouldn't do it, but you should have an honest discussion with yourself about whether you have the energy to keep up with a toddler.
- Usually, people who are alike fare better in terms of dating.
- They have a more stable relationship if their energy levels, ambitions, intelligence, values, and education are similar.
- As another example, it might not make sense to quit your job and start a new career if you're only a few years away from being able to retire. However, if you'll only be happy if you start your own ice cream truck, don't let anybody tell you that you're too old to do it. You might just need to wait a few years until you reach retirement so you'll have the security you need to pursue your dream.
- You should also take into accounts your financial responsibilities when you're deciding what's realistic. You shouldn't default on your debts and ruin your credit just because you feel like you're getting too old.
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Listen to your body. When you're trying to decide whether you're too old for something, it's important to take into consideration how you feel physically. If you have chronic pain or an old injury that limits your mobility, certain activities will be more difficult for you, no matter how young you are at heart.
- If you experience frequent back pain, for instance, you should take that into consideration when you're thinking about activities like mountain climbing or whitewater rafting.
- On the other hand, if you feel great physically and you're in good physical health, you shouldn't let anyone tell you that you're too old to try something new!

Method 2

Method 2 of 2:

Doing What You Love

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Do whatever you want if it isn't hurting anyone. No matter what society thinks, if you're not hurting anyone, including yourself, then what you do is nobody's business but your own. It's your life, and you should find what makes you happy. Forget the naysayers and follow your own path, especially if it plays to your strengths.^{[5]
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- Fashion guidelines, for example, dictate that a woman shouldn't wear a miniskirt after the age of 35. If you have amazing legs, however, why not show them off?^{[6]
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- Don't let anyone tell you that you're too old to dye your hair, get a tattoo, and go to rock shows, if that's what you want to do.
- If you're a teenager but you still want to carry a backpack with your favorite cartoon character, go for it! Unfortunately, other kids can be mean, so you should be prepared to get a little teasing.
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Be comfortable in your own skin. No matter what other people think, your biggest priority should be finding what makes you feel good about yourself every day. That might include the clothes you wear, how you style your hair, or the types of shoes or accessories you prefer.^{[7]
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- Don't let anyone tell you that you're too old to wear whatever you want, for instance, but do take into consideration what looks good on your body.
- Do keep in mind, however, that some styles might be less comfortable as you get older. For instance, very tight clothes or very high heels might be harder to manage all day as your body ages. If it's what you're used to and you're comfortable in it, though, wear it anyway!
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Avoid making a rash decision you might regret later. Sometimes, people get to a certain age and realize that they wish they had taken more risks when they were younger. This can sometimes lead to impulsive decisions that are often referred to as a "mid-life crisis." It's fine to shape your life to look how you want it, but you should think about your motives for making decisions, and make sure they're coming from a place that's not based out of regret or fear of aging.^{[8]
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- For instance, if you wish you had learned to surf when you were younger, you can always sign up for surfing lessons now. But it's probably not a good idea to quit your job and becoming a full-time beach bum if you have a family who depends on you.
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Take advice from others when it's warranted. You should always do what you love, but if the people around you are giving you advice that you're heading down the wrong path, it's worth giving it a second look. You can't live your life to please others, but the wisest people know when to listen to the people they love.^{[9]
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- For instance, if you are thinking of leaving your spouse and children to live in the woods as a wilderness guide, you might want to listen to your friends and family if they tell you that your time to be free and feral has passed.
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Learn about people who became successful later in life. If you need a little encouragement to follow your own path, read about some people who found success after spending years or even decades doing something else first. This might inspire you to take a chance you might not have considered otherwise!^{[10]
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- For instance, Stan Lee didn't find success creating comics until he was 39, and Julia Child published her first cookbook at the age of 50.
- Henry Ford created the Model T when he was 45.
- Grandma Moses, a famous artist, began painting at the age of 78.
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Accept your age. Sometimes, doing something that is typically reserved for younger people can be a way to attempt to escape aging. However, by accepting that aging is a natural part of life, and embracing the wisdom and maturity that come along with it, you can actually be much happier in life.^{[11]
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- In addition, embracing your age can make you seem younger, since you'll be happier and more likely to pursue activities that you genuinely love, rather than those that keep you stuck in the past.
- You can also upgrade your interests as you age. For instance, if you feel like you're too old to play with dolls but you still love dolls, you can start collecting them instead.

Expert Q&A

Question

Are you too old to have fun?

Leslie Bosch, PhD
Developmental Psychologist
Dr. Leslie Bosch is a Developmental Psychologist, National Board Certified Health and Wellness Coach, and Owner of Bosch Integrative Wellness. With over 15 years of experience, she specializes in providing stress relief coaching services to individuals and groups using a variety of scientifically proven methods for change including motivational interviewing, positive psychology, self-compassion, non-violent communication, social learning theory, and self-determination theory. Dr. Bosch received training from the Andrew Weil Center for Integrative Medicine at the University of Arizona and earned a PhD in Human Development and Family Studies from The University of Arizona. She is also a member of the National Board of Health and Wellness Coaching Association. Dr. Bosch has published many papers and been featured in the media numerous times.

Leslie Bosch, PhD

Developmental Psychologist

Expert Answer

Not always! I think it depends on the activity, clearly. If you like an activity and it brings you joy without any threat to your health or well-being, you can enjoy it without thinking you're too old.