Unfortunately, neighbors can sometimes be a nuisance or cause serious problems. Whether they party all night, seem standoffish, make noise, or have strange personalities these issues can be very troublesome and stressful to deal with. Sometimes problems may escalate into more serious issues such as property damage, domestic disturbances, dangerous pet problems, and property maintenance problems. You should always try to work out any problems with your neighbors before lodging an official complaint, and consider your own behavior as a neighbor.


Method 1
Method 1 of 3:

Trying to Get Along with Annoying Neighbors

  1. 1
    Assess what is bothering you. Are the neighbors simply noisy? Is their property a nuisance or hazard? Have they damaged your property in some way? [1]
    • The level of annoyance should determine how much action you take. For example, the neighbor with an infant who cries at 4 A.M. isn't doing anything bad on purpose. Some things you may not be able to prevent or control.
    • Before taking any official actions, consider how you might solve the problem on your own by talking to your neighbors.
    • However, if your neighbor's behavior puts you at immediate risk, such as a sanitation issue, don't hesitate to speak up.
  2. 2
    Consider your own behavior and lifestyle. You may have behaviors or habits that cause issues for your neighbors.
    • If you tend to be noisy or messy, consider quieting down or cleaning up.
    • If you have annoying habits, your neighbors will be less accommodating if you complain about them.
    • Therefore, make sure you are on your best behavior and see if your neighbors follow suit.
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  3. 3
    Talk to your other neighbors. You should see if they are having problems or issues with the people you find annoying or that are causing issues for you. [2]
    • If others are having the same problems with the offending neighbors, this justifies your complaint.
    • If more than one person is having the same problem, you can consider talking to the offending neighbors together.
    • There is strength in numbers. If you need to make a formal complaint, you should do this jointly.
  4. 4
    Talk to the offending neighbors nicely. Being demanding and mean to your neighbors can cause hard feelings and may tempt them to be more annoying. Instead, use kindness and reason when dealing with them. [3]
    • Be clear about what is bothering you. You just can't say they are bothering you for no reason.
    • Be straightforward, but reasonable. Don't yell or shout at your neighbor as that will just cause the situation to escalate.
    • Be very polite. Do not approach them with a confrontational attitude.[4]
    • For example, you can say Hi, James. We have been neighbors for a long time. I am so sorry. But last night, I couldn't fall asleep. I know you guys are having a good time. But, you know, I have to get up early in the morning. And I was just wondering if you could, keep the volume down late at night.[5]
    • If it is someone you are close with, and you think it may jeopardize the relationship, you can take a little box of cookies when you go to talk to them. But it may not be necessary.
    • If your neighbors aren't home often or if you can't get them to agree to sit down and talk, write them a polite letter that states your concerns.
  5. 5
    Suggest alternatives. Be creative in thinking of ways to allow the neighbors to do what they do, but in a less annoying manner.
    • For example, if they like to have noisy parties, ask them to end them earlier or have them only on the weekend.
    • If their property is a nuisance with tall weeds, garbage, or clutter, offer to help them clean it up.
    • If they have a pet that is causing a problem, suggest how they can keep the animal on a leash or build a fence.
    • If they have caused damage to your property you can suggest how they can fix it.
  6. 6
    Take matters into your own hands. Do what you can to fix the situation, especially if it is something the neighbors can't help or aren't able to fix. [6]
    • For example, if your problem is a crying infant at night, try sound proofing your walls.
    • If pets or kids are coming into your yard, consider building a fence.
    • Try to resolve the situation yourself before lodging a complaint.
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Method 2
Method 2 of 3:

Lodging a Complaint Against Your Neighbors

  1. 1
    Take notes. Make sure you document every incident involving your complaint. [7]
    • Write down the date, time, and nature of the complaint. For example, noise or disturbances, unkempt property etc.
    • If it is a constant problem you are more likely to get help from your landlord, neighborhood association, or the police.
    • Document any attempts to clear this up with the neighbors. Save any returned calls, emails, or letters that they use to respond to your request.
    • Simply letting your troublesome neighbor know you are making note of their annoying behavior can act as a deterrent from further violations.
  2. 2
    Check your lease, if you rent. There might be rules in it regarding noise, property maintenance, visitors, or pets.
    • If you find your neighbor's behavior is violating terms of the lease in your building, then you can let them know politely they are breaking the lease.
    • If they are breaking established rules set out in a lease, this can give you some leverage if you make a complaint with your landlord.
    • If they aren't violating the lease, you can still try to complain to the landlord.
  3. 3
    File a complaint with your landlord. Give them documentation about the incident with the offending neighbors and any attempts to get the neighbors to clean up their act.
    • The landlord might not want to hear about minor complaints such as small amounts of noise or things beyond your control, like a crying infant.
    • It your complaint regards a larger issue such as property damage or illegal activity, the landlord or management company will likely want to step in quickly.
    • Make sure you give them evidence you have resolved the issue yourself. Landlords will not want to deal with someone who is a constant complainer.
  4. 4
    Check local ordinances. There may be local laws regarding noise and disturbance, property maintenance, and pet control.
    • See if your neighbors are violating any of these.
    • If they are, consider making a complaint to a condo association or neighborhood organization.
    • You can also call the police if any of these violations get out of hand.
  5. 5
    Go to the authorities. If you feel threatened in any way, you should call the police. [8]
    • The police will respond to complaints about noise or domestic disturbance.
    • You may even save someone's life if you call about a domestic disturbance at a neighbor's property.
    • The police can visit the property to determine if a violation is taking place. For example, if they are violating a noise level ordinance the police can assess that and write a citation.
    • The police can keep your identity anonymous so the neighbors won't know who made the complaint.
    • Make a complaint to your local precinct for less immediate concerns. Use these wisely, as too many complaints will be a nuisance to police and may be a distraction from their job.
    • The police are unlikely to be able to help about something like a dangerous tree limb or overgrown property, so keep your complaints to noise, disturbances, or troublesome behavior. [9]
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Method 3
Method 3 of 3:

Taking Your Neighbors to Small Claims Court

  1. 1
    Consider taking your neighbors to court if they have caused you significant financial losses. This can be for many different issues. [10]
    • One of the most common reasons people take neighbors to court is property damage, vandalism, or property destruction.
    • You can also take a neighbor to court for ordinance violations, property maintenance issues, noise violations and disturbances.
    • Don’t expect any financial reimbursements unless you have lost money due to your neighbors. If your neighbors, for example, have a dangerous tree limb or overgrown property, the court can order them to remedy the issue and/or pay a fine.
  2. 2
    Consult a lawyer if you have doubts about filing a court case. Your lawyer can give you insight on how to file a suit and what to expect from your complaint. [11]
    • Provide all details, documentation, and evidence of formal complaint to your attorney.
    • Make sure you tell your attorney about any attempts to remedy the situation outside of court. Provide any documents relevant to these attempts such as voicemails, text messages, letters, etc.
    • If you have suffered property damage or financial losses due to your neighbors, then provide any receipts you have, photos, insurance claims etc.
  3. 3
    File a court case with your local small claims court. Keep in mind that only cases where smaller amounts of money are requested or complaints about local ordinance violations can be processed by small claims courts. [12]
    • Most small claims cases have a damages request limit of $5000.00.
    • You will need to fill out an application and provide documentation behind your complaint.
    • Provide receipts or estimates of the damages, and how you arrived at the amount of your requested damages.
    • Provide any other documentation regarding your complaint against your neighbors such as letters, voicemails, text messages, or emails. You can also provide photos of property damage or a poorly kept property.
    • If you have called the police, provide any police reports filed in relation to your suit.
    • Pay the court fee.
  4. 4
    Understand the process of a small claims court case. There are several stages to a small claims suit. [13]
    • You will have to file an application and pay a fee, and provide any documentation.
    • The court will have to notify your neighbors or any other defendants of the suit.
    • The court will then schedule the court date, and this may take several weeks.
    • The court case will then take place and the judge or magistrate will make a judgement.
    • If damages are awarded to you, it may take several weeks or even months to start receiving your settlement. You may even receive it in installments.
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Community Q&A

  • Question
    What should you do if your neighbor's child takes your place in your family and your parents love her more than they love you and your little sister hugs her and kisses her on the cheek every time she meets her and she always make weird faces at you and said that I'm no one right to my face. What can I do?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    Say something to your parents about how you feel left out. Chances are, they don't realize what this new person in their life is doing to you. Ignore any negative comments from the neighbor kid, and focus on spending more time with your family, perhaps suggesting family outings that are away from home, even for a few hours.
  • Question
    My neighbor plays basketball inside their apartment and it keeps me up at night, what can I do?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    Talk to them. Tell them, calmly and politely, that you cannot sleep due to their playing basketball during the night. Ask them if they could please keep it to daylight hours only. If they refuse to do so, contact your landlord or building manager. They probably don't want people playing basketball indoors and would likely confront your neighbor about it.
  • Question
    How do I deal with neighbors who complain about my home being loud if they yell at me from their house and don't talk to me in up close and in person?
    Community Answer
    Community Answer
    Regardless of whether they are being neighborly and respectful, show some respect by listening to your neighbors' complaints and trying to do something about the loud noises. It's really to your advantage to have a good relationship with them if possible. Reducing the noise level may make them more receptive to in-person conversations.
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About This Article

Tami Claytor
Co-authored by:
Etiquette Coach
This article was co-authored by Tami Claytor. Tami Claytor is an Etiquette Coach, Image Consultant, and the Owner of Always Appropriate Image and Etiquette Consulting in New York, New York. With over 20 years of experience, Tami specializes in teaching etiquette classes to individuals, students, companies, and community organizations. Tami has spent decades studying cultures through her extensive travels across five continents and has created cultural diversity workshops to promote social justice and cross-cultural awareness. She holds a BA in Economics with a concentration in International Relations from Clark University. Tami studied at the Ophelia DeVore School of Charm and the Fashion Institute of Technology, where she earned her Image Consultant Certification. This article has been viewed 121,262 times.
8 votes - 85%
Co-authors: 13
Updated: January 11, 2023
Views: 121,262
Categories: Neighbors
Article SummaryX

Having an annoying neighbor can be extremely frustrating, but try to work out any problems with them to keep the peace. Start by seeing if there’s anything you can do to help the situation. For example, if they’re noisy, think about soundproofing your walls. You can also talk to your neighbors about what’s bothering you. Be as nice and direct as possible, and be willing to suggest compromises. For instance, if their yard has become a nuisance, ask if you can help clean it up. If your neighbors don’t respond to your requests, then lodge a complaint against them with their landlord or the police. Document every incident involving your complaint, including the date, time, and issue. To learn how to take your neighbors to small claims court, keep reading!

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